Walking on Water

Over the past three months, I’ve felt as if I was living in a somewhat milder, but just as shocking, “Kardashian-style” reality show. For weeks, I have weathered spiritual storms. It’s as if I’m drowning in one tragedy (okay, I’m being a bit dramatic…maybe a better word to use for “tragedy” is “disappointment”) to only catch my breath just in time to endure the next dunk. If my life were a TV show, I’d have a captured audience eager to TiVo the next week’s episode!

Through my trials, I had grown spiritually weak…desperately weak. I didn’t want to pray and I was avoiding my Bible or reading it reluctantly inadvertently blocking any of God’s Word from penetrating my soggy situations. Self-pity took over and for weeks I was covering my pillow with showers of tears. I was honestly feeling hopeless, but never wanting to admit it to myself (let alone anyone else).

I was battling with a prodigal teenager, failed employment attempts, and sobering financial strain--more crashing waves of “disappointments” than I thought my little mind could bear. But God had a plan.

Like many Christians, I had quickly forgotten that trials come to make us stronger.

“Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.” James 1:2-4 (The Message)

After weeks of receiving encouraging notes, emails, and prayers from loving friends and family, I woke up one morning with a smile on my face! God is still good. I realized that in order to get through these damp circumstances in life, I had to implement a new strategy. I began to ask God to “Fix me.” We will never be rid of problems as long as we walk this earth, but we can certainly change our attitudes towards them. I gained newfound peace knowing that God was working on me in His time, not mine.

Dealing with my current struggles remind me so much of the story of Jesus and Peter walking on water. Although the disciples were afraid when they first saw Jesus walking across that lake, they quickly gained strength when the Savior told them, “Take courage. It is I. Don’t be afraid.” (Matthew 14:27) I imagine Jesus saying those exact words to me, “Kenya, take courage…”

Like Peter, I’m afraid at times letting distractions weaken my faith and cause me to sink in the murky waters of life that beat upon my feet. What a blessing it is to cry, “Lord, save me!” (again and again)

He hasn’t failed me yet.

Although I’m still currently in my storms, I’m slowly learning to “sing in the rain” knowing that it is all working for my good. You’d be surprised what a good cry can wash away. I’m no longer afraid to get a little wet.







By Kenya
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