Far Above Rubies

God is with Us

2011-12-24T08:47:00.001-05:00

What is the longest you have ever had to wait for something?

Seconds for your iPhone to connect to the internet? Minutes in 1998 for the esteemed dial-up AOL to connect to the internet? Hours in the Best Buy parking lot on Black Friday, like Amy? Days, months, years; we are all in the process of waiting.

A man named Abram had to wait 25 long years for the single most life-changing event to happen: the birth of his son.

It’s like me having to wait until I’m 50 before Jason and I are able to have kids. Incredible. (And I know some of you have gone through something very similar to Abram and Sarai.)

25 years Abram waited. God appeared and spoke to him and Sarai numerous times in those years, urging them to keep their eyes steady on the covenant He had made with them: a son would come, and the entire world would be blessed through him.

Then came laughter and joy through Isaac. Abe and Sarah delighted in their son. God had finally fulfilled His promise... or did He? God’s promise did not end with Isaac; Isaac was only the beginning of the promise fulfilled.

Many years later, Abraham’s descendants, the great nation of Israel, became troubled... a lot. They forgot God’s promises over and over again, and eventually Babylon and Assyria carried them away from their home, their inheritance, into captivity. Throughout their history, there had been hints, prophecies, of a coming King, whose rule would never end. They yearned for this King as they were enslaved, oppressed, mourning in exile. They wanted deliverance, someone to ransom them. They realized their need for salvation.

They sang from the Psalms, “Restore us, O God; make your face shine upon us, that we may be saved” (Psalm 80). They sought a Messiah, an Anointed One, to restore them to their home.

Five hundred years later, Israel found themselves occupied by Rome. They continued to long for a great warrior king, a priest. Someone to free them! God is faithful!

They received Jesus. Jesus, who, instead of overthrowing Rome, revolutionized the living of life itself. Who, instead of ruling through fear and violence, served through love and forgiveness. Who, instead of ostentatiously flaunting his position and power, lowered himself, even to death.

The Anointed One has come, fulfilling God’s promise. Jesus was worth the wait, but he wasn’t what was expected.

Now, we wait for the Messiah’s return, for God to make all things new. “Everything God made is waiting with excitement for God to show his children’s glory completely,” says Romans 8:19.

Centuries of expectations have led us to this point. We long for a day when we get to see this God that we love and worship face to face. Our bodies and souls yearn for completeness and intimacy that can’t come from any human relationship. We’re tired of violence and manipulation and the pursuit of power- we thirst for peace and freedom. We are eager to see suffering turned into joy, and mourning to dancing. And it will be beyond our expectations.

What are you waiting for?

Are you living right now in eager expectation of the promise: Jesus, our Savior, making everything new? Are you participating right now in God’s promise to bless the entire world? May we realize that, in our waiting for our Isaacs, for freedom from captivity to the things of the world, for Jesus to fix the brokenness, He has been there all along. Immanuel: God is with us.

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By Amanda
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- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Waiting in Line

2011-12-08T11:42:00.001-05:00

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving this year. Now we are just a few days away from Christmas. Crazy, huh? Speaking of crazy, were you one of the ‘crazies’ that were out on Thanksgiving night waiting in a parking lot somewhere? When I say ‘crazies’ I mean it in a good way and I am also referring to myself. My niece and I went to Best Buy around 8:00 and there were about 100 people in front of us. And of course throughout the evening, people were behind us wrapped around the building. We waited until 10:00 when they passed out tickets for certain items. We didn’t get the ticket we went for, but we waited until 12:00 since we had already waited so long and ended up getting a few good deals. This got me to thinking about the waiting in line people do, especially on black Friday and of course now on Thanksgiving night. People were camped out at Best Buy since Wednesday! So they spent Thanksgiving day in a parking lot. They must have taken shifts or something. I don’t know. But people, myself included, will wait in line for hours for stuff – material items that will not matter when this life is over. Matthew 6:19-21 says “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroys, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” As I was saying earlier, this got me to thinking. We will wait in line for a material item for hours. I wonder if we would wait in line for hours to hear the gospel preached? We will sit and watch a movie with no problem, even a long movie, but we have a fit if the preacher goes over a few minutes. I wonder if we would wait in line for hours to help people in need? Or are we like the priest and Levite who passed on by, not even lending a few minutes let alone hours to help someone in need. I wonder if we would wait in line for hours to see Jesus? Luke 8:40 says “And as Jesus returned, the people welcomed Him, for they had all been waiting for Him.” The verse doesn’t say how long they waited, but the fact is they waited. If we can wait for hours for a ‘thing’ why can’t we spend hours (or even one hour) in reading the word of God? Now you may do so and that is great; but, shamefully, I admit that I do not spend hours in the word of God on a daily basis. I write this to encourage myself, and if it encourages someone else along the way, then wonderful. Come next Thanksgiving, you will possibly find me in a parking lot somewhere waiting for something. I just hope that between now and then I would have spent that same amount of time and hopefully lots more in the things that will really matter when this life is ore. Thank you for letting me share my thoughts with you. I would love to hear your thoughts as well. I wish you and yours a very happy holiday season and a wonderful 2012!

Proverbs 8:34 “Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my gates, waiting at my doorposts.”

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By Amy
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- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T10:42:00.001-05:00

It’s that time of year again. The time when we set aside a day to be thankful and to celebrate all the blessings in our lives. Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays. I love it because it’s just about family time, reflecting on what God has given us, and, in my family, good southern food. There’s no shopping involved. I like shopping, but I’ve come to dislike the focus on “stuff” that Christmas brings. Thanksgiving is perfect. It’s usually a lazy day (unless you are the cook) filled with just being with other people.

This year I have so much to be thankful for. I know that like most of you, I could say that every day of my life. We live in a country that has been abundantly blessed in every way. This year though, I feel especially blessed. I have a story to share here soon. Most of you know all or at least part of my story. For those that don’t, I’ll keep you in suspense for a while longer.

I do want to share some of the things I’m particularly thankful for during this season:

· Answered prayers
· A caring church family
· God’s providence
· Generous friends
· My supportive family
· Understanding bosses and co-workers
· God’s timing
· Immeasurable prayers offered up for me and my family
· My amazingly loving husband
· Friendly advice
· God’s graciousness
· The color PINK.

As always I am so thankful for a God who loves me and has a plan for my life. I’m thankful that He demonstrated His love for me through the sacrifice of His Son. I’m thankful that He continually shows His love for me in both big and small ways.

Happy Thanksgiving!

What are you thankful for this year?
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By Jennifer
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- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Memorization

2011-10-06T17:00:00.001-04:00

As children in Bible classes, we were often assigned portions of Scripture to memorize and recite the next time we would meet. I can recall learning the passage and reciting it with pride, only to forget it within a week's time! The same routine continued throughout high school, though this time with academics. Formulas in math were only stored mentally for a short time (i.e. until the test was passed), as were Shakespearean quotes, governing laws, and Spanish verb conjugations.

There are many "popular" Bible passages that people all over the world have memorized: John 3:16, Psalm 23, I Corinthians 13:4-8 are just a few. Theses passages are beautiful, meaningful, comforting, and lovely! Knowing them by heart can bring reassurance and peace in times of trouble and in day-to-day life.

Now let's look at Psalm 119:11, "Your word I have treasured in my heart, that I may not sin against You" (NASB). It seems here that the Psalmist is on to something we too often fail to take notice of. We tend to memorize passages of Scripture that are "feel good" passages--and we should! But do we realize that a tool for fighting temptation is right at our fingertips?

Why don't we memorize verses such as Galatians 5:16-17,
"But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please."

Or Romans 6:12-14,
"Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts, and do not go on presenting the members of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. For sin shall not be master over you, for you are not under law but under grace."

Why do we suppress these Scriptures when we begin thinking of passages we'd like to "treasure in our hearts?" Do we maybe not feel good when we read these verses? Do we maybe feel convicted, pierced, pricked to the heart? One of our main motives for memorizing Scripture should be as we read in Psalm 119:11, "That I may not sin against You [God]."

Which passages in God's Word convict you? Which are difficult for you to read, because you know you struggle to follow them? I know I have many, and I need to etch them more deeply into my heart, as well. I challenge us to find those Scriptures--and memorize them, write them down! When we learn to treasure Scriptures that encourage and warn us to keep from sin, we will find that indulging in Satan's destructive traps becomes less and less enticing and obeying God's perfect commands becomes more and more appealing.

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By Hannah
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- Posted using BlogPress for iPad

Yeast, Salt and Paint Drops

2011-09-15T01:08:00.001-04:00

When Erica asked me to write for this blog, I was surprised, honored, and excited! I greatly enjoy engaging in spiritual conversation, and this is certainly a unique opportunity. But, it's a little hard for me to stick with one idea, and to hold back from discussing every thought I have about that idea. I'm technologically challenged, having started 3 other postings, but messing them up with my word processor and email! After prayer and contemplation, I decided to write what's in my heart and mind at the moment, and hope that at least one good idea might come from each attempt. So, here goes!

We recently took on a major painting project in our den, repainting fake wood paneling. (After much discussion through the years, we're filling in the grooves in the paneling...that's what makes it a major job!) I'm easily entertained, so I get a kick out of going to the paint store. Who doesn't enjoy watching paint mixers at work?! It's almost magical to see a gallon of pure white paint, turned into “Sandstone” or “Orange Confection,” “Butternut” or “Library Red” with just a few tiny drops of colored tint. After watching this process last week with Phil, he said what I was thinking: “It's almost like a perfect illustration of the verse about a little leaven.”

In Galations 5:9, Paul says that “a little yeast works through the whole batch of dough”, and again in I Cor. 5:6, a similar statement is made. (Any of us who have made bread, have surely been fascinated as we watched our little ball of dough, double in size.) In both verses, Paul illustrates how quickly a bad influence can take over, and change the original ingredients, if we allow ourselves to be mixed in with that yeast. The yeast, and salt described elsewhere in the New Testament, illustrate the very, very small amount of influence needed to change a group of people, or to greatly change our individual lives.

Although the yeast illustration describes a bad influence, the salt illustration by Jesus in Matthew 5:13, is describing a small amount of something, having a huge influence for good. We can be that yeast, or salt, (or paint tint drops) and become the influencing factor. Often, when participating in a small act of kindness, or good work, I question if there's any lasting good that will come from what I'm doing. I truly believe that as we are described as the “salt of the world” we can have a great impact on others, even with our seemingly small influence.

And so, my experiences with paint mixing over the last few weeks, helped to renew thoughts about being alert, for even the smallest amount of evil influencing my life. What do I do with choices in friendships, associates, and entertainment, especially? What do I read, listen to, and watch?

On the other hand, how wonderful to realize that as small influences can work for evil, they can also work for large amounts of good! I don't want to be the color to change someone else's life in a bad way, but want to use that small bit of influence I might have, to color their world with a reflection of Christ. That child we talk to and teach, the person we speak to with a smile, will see Christ in us. May we all beware of “tiny” bad influences, and strive to be good salt, leaven, and yes, even paint drops, for others! May we realize how big of an effect our influence can have, and pray for God to help us use it to his glory.

God’s Providence

2011-08-31T14:27:00.000-04:00

The word providence is defined in more than one way in The Random House College Dictionary Revised Edition. The first definition is the foreseeing care and guardianship of God over His creatures. There are people who claim they can predict the future, but no one knows the future. Only God knows the future. He knows what our future holds. He knows what we have needed in the past, what we currently need and what we will need in the future. Just think, things in our life may be happening today because of a future need that He sees. Does that make sense?

Another definition of providence in the aforementioned dictionary is a manifestation of divine care or direction. I believe in the providence of God. I have seen the providence of God. I have felt the providence of God. I know that God has cared for and directed me in the past. I know that my Redeemer lives and still cares for and directs me in this life.

Romans 8:28 is a favorite verse of many people. It says “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” There are many examples in the Bible where God worked providentially in people’s lives. There are many examples today where He is doing the same thing, working providentially behind the scenes in our lives for future good. What are some ways that God has shown his providential care in your life?

One example in my life and my family’s life is the adoption of my niece. Things happened in my sister and brother-in-law’s life that led to her adoption. They look back at those things and realize it was God’s providence. I’m sure we can all think of a chain of events in our lives that led to something wonderful, a blessing from God. I firmly believe in the providence of God with reference to my wonderful husband. I won’t go into detail, but God worked behind the scenes to make our paths cross. I don’t see how I would ever had met him had it not been for God’s providence.

Another more recent example is when my husband lost his job a few short months ago. It wasn’t just my husband, it was his entire department, across the state, that was being cut. At first, of course, everyone thinks that is terrible. We thought the same thing. But looking at it now, it actually was a good thing. He now has a job at a great place that he likes. This new job is more flexible. He can work from home now some, which gives him more time with our son. He actually was going to have to go to work somewhere that he didn’t really want to, but it was a job, so he was going to do it. But within a matter of days, this other opportunity came up and was finalized. Well, I don’t believe it just came up. I believe that God answered our prayers and had been providentially taking care of us all along the way. When we first heard about the job loss, of course there were mixed emotions. I recall however not being that worried. I knew that things would work out for the best. During this time I had posted on facebook these words to that familiar song… “There are things about tomorrow, I don’t seem to understand, but I know who holds tomorrow and I know who holds my hand”. I feel like things happen for a reason, whether we know and understand that reason or not. I knew that God would provide. And as always, He did.

I am reminded of a song “Jesus, Savior, Pilot Me”. Part of the song says, “Chart and compass came from thee, Jesus, Savior, pilot me”. I want Jesus to always be my pilot. I am thankful that he is my chart and compass through life and that he is guiding me and providing for me. May you see God’s providence in your life today.

Son

2011-08-22T18:23:00.000-04:00

What a treat... a week at my son's house in Jackson. My husband was coming on the weekend for a cookout and we would have a leisurely trip home together. Maybe spend some time in Nashville, where we lived for seven years.

A phone call changed everything...

My son, who is a police officer, had left for work at 11:30 pm. on June 2, 2010. Around
1:30 am. on June 3 my husband called and told me to sit down. "Travis has been shot... all they know is he was shot four times, two were in the chest, he is conscious. A police officer is coming to pick you up and I am on the way!"

It all happened in a moment... Praying...

I was begging God to spare my son's life. My mind was racing...my heart was pounding... but the world somehow was in slow motion. My heart kept pleading to my Father in Heaven...please God...he's my son.

When I arrived at the hospital there was a blur of police officers lining the halls. I heard myself saying "Where's my son?" Someone called to me and lead me into the ER, blood on the floor... the sheets...and I see him. He raised his head and looked at me... (why did he look 5 years old to me instead of the young man of 26 that he was) He spoke, "Someone get my mom a chair!"

God is so good... impact plates and a police vest kept the two bullets from penetrating his heart, his leg would heal, and after surgery and rehab his shoulder would also heal. His daddy and I would still hear his voice, his laughter, watch him tease his brother, teach God's Word,... lead his life.

During those difficult days the prayers, phone calls, and messages sustained us. I kept thinking of a phrase in the song "A Common Love" which says..."A common strength when we're weary..." We were physically and emotionally weary, however, our Spirit was being renewed by the blessing of being a part of God's loving family.

I pray we will never forget that God gave His Son for our sins... Our Father in Heaven gave His only Son....for me and for you. I cannot comprehend so great a sacrifice... I know God must love us so very much. Our God is an awesome God...Thank you, Father.

I Don't Know

2011-08-15T10:45:00.004-04:00

A favorite response of mine lately is, "I don’t know." This month, Lord willing, I will be entering college: new place, new people, new ideas, new routines, and the list goes on. Change is difficult for me, and I’m sure it is for many other Christian ladies, as well.

People ask me questions about it everyday. Some go like this: "Are you going to have a coffeepot for your room?" You know me so well! I think and say aloud. Other questions are more difficult, and the mental and verbal answers often differ: "What are you going to major in?" Stay-at-home-Mom! I think with a grin. Uh, I don’t really know…I like to write, so…English? I also like to bake…and sing…and stuff. Yes, that’s more like the real answer—I don’t know!

Jehoshaphat didn’t know what to do either. And though he wasn’t choosing a career, deciding when to finish his essay, or having to make new friends, the things he did to deal with his ignorance of how to handle a situation can teach us a lot today.

Second Chronicles 20 opens pretty bleakly. Nations were coming to make war against Jehoshaphat, and he was afraid (v.1-3)! But he turned to the Lord—and he wasn’t alone in doing so. Verse 4 says that all the cities of Judah gathered together to seek help from the Lord! We see through Jehoshaphat’s prayer, specifically verse 6, that he knew God was (and still is!) God of the heavens. He knew God was (and still is!) ruler over all the kingdoms of the nations. He knew power and might were (and still are!) in His hand so that no one can stand against Him. Jehoshaphat knew he and his people could (as we still can!) cry out to Him in distress, and He would hear and deliver them (v.9). The prayer of Jehoshaphat is concluded in verse 12 with a beautiful, comforting declaration: "For we are powerless before this great multitude who are coming against us; nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are on You."

Relief! That’s exactly what we find when we know who God is and what He can do when we trust Him! Jehoshaphat knew he couldn’t defeat that army alone, but He knew Who could. He didn’t know what to do, but he knew Who did! And when he asked and trusted, God took care of it (v. 14-23)! We each experience different "don’t know" times in life. My college anxieties are small, for example, compared to a woman who is facing an unfaithful spouse or a widow who is battling poor health. But you know what? We can all appreciate and take advantage of the fact that no matter how seemingly small or big our "I don’t knows" are, God can and will take care of them if we keep our eyes on Him, simply trusting and obeying.

Ms. Nancy

2011-07-12T13:16:00.000-04:00

She’s the first person I remember teaching me about Jesus. Well, other than my parents, of course. She’s taught Jesus to two generations in our church. If you grew up attending the same church that I attend, or if you’ve had a child there in the past twenty or so years, you know exactly who I am talking about.

Nancy Mabry.

I honestly can’t remember ever not loving Ms. Nancy. She is part of my earliest childhood memories. I was a very shy child and I always remember Ms. Nancy being so kind to me and not embarrassing me or making me feel bad about being shy. She always encouraged me and loved me just the way I was. I will always be thankful to her for that.

Ms. Nancy is what most of us would call, “old-fashioned.” She grew up in what she refers to as a “different world.” A world that was perhaps, a bit more structured and polite than the frenzied time in which we live now. She has lived her entire life in the same community and was baptized in our church many years ago, although the physical location of the church was just a few yards down the street from the current location.

Ms. Nancy had two brothers who were stillborn. As a result she was very close to her parents and thinks she is most like her daddy. He taught her that rules were to be followed and to remember her good name and not “mess it up.”

Ms. Nancy has two great loves in her life. One is animals. If a stray animal happens to wonder anywhere near Ms. Nancy’s house, it will have a home for life. There is no telling how many animals, especially cats, that have been rescued by Ms. Nancy. The other one, and something she inherited from her daddy, is her love for children. She hasn’t met a child yet that she didn’t love. Oh, no doubt, there have been some that have been hard to love, but never impossible for her. She has lived a lifetime of ministering to children. I am thankful to God that I was one of those children.

Ms. Nancy says that she never really thought very much about working with children when she was young. It just sort of happened. In her late twenties she decided she wanted to be more involved in the church. One of her friends was teaching the 4 and 5 year old class and needed a co-teacher. Eventually, as a result of the church’s bus ministry, that class grew to the point where they needed two classes. At the same time, the friend had a baby and took some time off from teaching. Ms. Nancy found herself with her very own class and hasn’t stopped teaching yet. Oh, she’s not in a classroom anymore. She had to give that up a couple of years ago, but she has never and will never stop teaching. Even though she isn’t formally teaching anymore, she wants kids to know that she still loves them. Even us older ones.

There are so many things I could tell you about her. She has influenced so many young people. I often wonder how many people have heard the Good News from one of Ms. Nancy’s students. How many young men that she taught became preachers, elders or teachers? How many young women are now teaching young children because of her example?

I know at least one.

What I really want to share though, is some advice from Ms. Nancy. Here are some of her words of wisdom:

“We need to learn as much as we can while we are here to learn it.”

“You are always an influence on someone whether good or bad. That carries into adulthood. Go in the right direction doing good. Someone is always watching.

“Be more helpful and less critical.”

“Be kind and compassionate. Put God first. God is in control.”

And finally, the best advice from one of my best teachers:

“Serve God and keep his commandments and teach others to do the same thing.”

I love you Ms. Nancy!!

Hands

2011-06-29T21:41:00.001-04:00

Today, we officially welcome Amanda Brazier with her first article for us at Far Above Rubies.

Hands are powerful. They can speak when words are insufﬁcient. They can lift up the
brokenhearted and comfort the suffering. They can communicate love.

During our mission trip to the Dominican Republic last week, our hands did just that.

They held the hands of a little girl at VBS, when mouths could not speak the language.
They played simple hand games with a laughing child.
They formed a circle every night in a time of song and prayer.
They stacked victoriously over a completed puzzle during Community Day.
They supported a little boy as he crossed the monkey bars at the Childrenʼs Home.
They took the hands of a daughter and her elderly mother, who was crying in pain in the
hospital.
They painted the ﬁngernails of women and girls who scavenged every day through the
town dump to ﬁnd food and clothing.
They handed out peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and care packages to those who
had nothing.

They extended love to everyone they touched.
And they touched Jesus where ever they extended love.

“And the King will reply, ʻI tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of
these brothers of mine, you did for me.” Matthew 25:40

Eve's Choice

2011-06-26T20:56:00.002-04:00

Where is the most beautiful place you've ever been? What was the most peaceful and protected you have ever felt? Can you picture your life with no stress, no worry, no To Do List?

Can you imagine having all of that - the beauty, the peace, the quiet mind - all at once? I honestly can't, but I imagine that is very close to what Eve must have had in the Garden of Eden.

What would it take for you to give that up - to even risk losing the perfection that surrounded you? Maybe Eve didn't know how good she had it there in the garden with her husband. Maybe she was ignorant of how sad life apart from God is, after all, she had no example of sin before her.

But maybe not. Maybe she wanted more and was willing - knowingly willing - to risk everything to get it. God gave her the free will to choose and so, maybe she felt she deserved to choose what she wanted over what she knew was right.

As we know, sin calls to us in three ways: lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and the pride of life (1 John 2:16) and the serpent came at Eve with guns blazing. Genesis 3:6 tells us that Eve saw that the fruit was good for food [lust of the flesh], pleasing to the eye [lust of the eye] and desirable for gaining wisdom [pride of life].

Satan doesn't miss a trick, does he?

And so, Eve ate the fruit. The Bible doesn't tell us if Satan came to Eve just that once or many times wearing her down. But it really doesn't matter. She made the choice and she faced the consequences. Suddenly, she was hiding from God and worried about her appearance. She and Adam were banished from paradise, from the perfection that had been created just for them. They would now have to work and worry, strain, stress and sacrifice And Sibelius every human that followed.

Thankfully, God - so full of love for his creation - has given humanity a second chance at paradise. And, like Eve, we are told plainly what is right and what is expected of us. But also like Eve, we are given a choice. We can follow the lusts of our flesh and eyes or our selfish pride trying to make our own versions of paradise here on Earth or we can chose the better thing, the real, eternal Paradise with God when this worry and strain-filled life is over.

I am thankful for the freedom to choose, but I am far more thankful for God's grace and the hope we have for eternal life with Him in the real paradise.

Are You Serious?

2011-06-23T13:07:00.002-04:00

When I was approached via email by Erica about becoming part of Far Above Rubies as a contributing writer, my initial reaction was ‘are you serious?’. I actually typed that question to her in an email. Of course she (and the other ladies) were serious, but it really caught me by surprise that I would be asked to write. I was shocked, excited and honored by that offer from The Ruby Sisters. I never have considered myself a writer. Yeah, I’ve written a few poems, but haven’t we all? Then I got to thinking that EVERYONE has SOMETHING to write about. Yes, it may not always appeal to every reader that comes across it, but there will be some (at least your mom or husband or sister) who will enjoy reading what you write. Everyone has their own personal experiences from which others can glean valuable lessons from, or you know, at least a good chuckle. We all come from different backgrounds with different perspectives and different experiences and trials and emotions, etc. We can learn from each other though despite these differences. We’re all different, but yet we’re all the same too. For example, I may be going through one type of loss while another person may be struggling with a different type of loss, but we’re still both experiencing LOSS. The experience may be different, but the feelings are the same. So it is through these lenses, that I am going to share my words on Far Above Rubies and hopefully someone will enjoy reading it or possibly benefit by reading it, or you know, at least get a good chuckle for the day.

I want to thank The (original) Ruby Sisters for allowing me to be a part of this journey with you all and I can’t wait to read what the new Ruby Sisters have to share. Have a blessed day!

"Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones." Proverbs 16:24

Punishment Fit for the Crime

2011-06-19T23:53:00.000-04:00

Today we are proud to publish the first post by new Far Above Rubies writer, Janet Gant. Thank you, Janet!

Birth (with the exceptions of Adam and Eve), Life and Death (with the exceptions of Enoch and Elijah) - the trio is a constant for man since the time he was banished from Eden. Yet, while the first two events may be cause for joy and celebration, the last may be cause for despair or at the very least some sort of distress and sadness. When Death comes knocking at our door, even at the end of a long and successful life, most people are not ready to answer the unsettling call. Much more so, when death is not only premature but cruel and violent, does it demand our acknowledgment and attention. Throughout human history, intentional abuse of a human resulting in death infuriates our sense of justice and cries out for compassion. With this sense of justice and compassion we look into the history of man to examine for ourselves the cruelest forms of death.

The ancient world had many forms of punishment and torture that resulted in death. The “summa supplicia” (or the ultimate punishments in ancient Rome) lists crucifixion, exposure to wild beasts and burning alive as their top three, of these crucifixion tops the chart as ‘the cruelest of deaths’.

Crucifixion was a public spectacle and meant to inflict “the most pain”, it was also considered the most debasing as “the condemned man was stripped naked and left exposed in his agony” while all the world look on. For exemplary effect, crucifixion was held at well-travelled public road to strike fear to passersby and to cause humiliation to the one hung on the cross.

This was not a thing that even the ancient world would want to ponder upon. Therefore it was not publicized in their writings or their historical records. From the few lines sprinkled here and there in their ancient literature, in the writings of play writers, poets, philosophers, orators and historians, we gather that crucifixion was widely practiced.

Yet acts so horrific and so numerous could be so easily swept under the proverbial rug of time and forgotten in the 21^st century as not anything new if not for the weekly reminder of the cross of Christ in the Christian celebration of the Lord’s Supper. But, today the Christian is not any more shocked with the thought of the cross nor is the image of the cross an instrument of the cruelty looked upon with disdain. In fact, we embrace it as part of our religion. Have we softened the view of the cross to where it is no longer an instrument of death, pain, shame, humiliation and is it any longer remembered as an act of cruelty and inhumanity of man to man?

In fact the ancient Greeks and the Romans spoke of crucifixion as a practice among barbarians -Indians, Phoenicians, Persians, Assyrians, Sclythians, Celts, Taurians and Thracians. Neither would claim responsibility or culpability but downplay their own use of this form of execution.

But in fact, both Greeks and Romans practiced it shamelessly. Even though Rome did not invent this form of torture when they adopted it, they used it with vengeance and refined it to an art.

According to Theological Archaeological Review, “Before being crucified, the victim was stripped and bound to a column and scourged with a stick or flagellum, a Roman instrument with a short handle to which several long, thick thongs had been attached. On the ends of the leather thongs were lead or bone tips. Following the severe beating the horizontal beam was placed upon the condemned man’s shoulders and he began the long grueling march to the execution site. A soldier at the head of the procession carried the titulus, an inscription written on wood, which stated the defendant’s name and the crime for which he had been condemned. When the procession arrived at the execution site, a vertical stake was fixed into the ground. The victim’s feet were then nailed down against this vertical stake.”

“Without any supplementary body support, the victim would die from muscular spasms and asphyxia in a very short time, certainly within two or three hours. Shortly after being raised on the cross, breathing would become difficult, to get his breath, the victim would attempt to draw himself up on his arms. In order to prolong the agony, Roman executioners devised instruments that would keep the victims alive on the cross for extended periods of time.” One, such instrument known as the “sedile, was a small seat attached to the front of the cross, about halfway down” to allow the victim to support himself to get a breath. “To increase the victim’s suffering, the sedile was pointed, thus inflecting horrible pain.” Jesus agonized on the cross for 6 hours before he died.

In 315 AD, under Constantine, crucifixion was abolished in the Roman Empire. Hanging on the gallows gradually took the place of crucifixion and was essentially a more humane punishment.

Seneca, a Roman philosopher who lived during the time of Christ wrote in his Epistle 101 to Lucilius, “Can anyone be found who would prefer wasting away in pain dying limb by limb, or letting out his life drop by drop, rather than expiring once for all? Can any man be found willing to be fastened to the accursed tree, long sickly, already deformed, swelling with ugly weal on shoulders and chest, and drawing the breath of life amid long-drawn-out agony? He would have many excuses for dying even before mounting the cross.”

If you had a choice of death would you ever prefer crucifixion? How could God select such a death for Jesus? So if Jesus had to die for our sins why choose the cruelest form of all deaths? Would hanging not suffice the wrath of God? Would any form of death do? It is a no wonder that Jesus asked the Father if it were possible for “this cup to pass”, in the Garden of Gethsemane.

In our day and time when a criminal is sentenced to death, we try to administer it in the most humane way. The criminal may earn the right to die but not the added punishment of pain and suffering. So why did Christ have to suffer such a humiliating, painful and agonizing death?

Maybe in God’s eye the punishment had to fit the crime. Imagine a punishment that does not fit the crime - a person sentenced to 20 years in prison when he murdered and tortured countless people. Sometimes even when a person is sentenced to death, that punishment is still not equal to the atrocities committed. Just a painless death by injection sometimes does not do much for our sense of justice. If he had to suffer and feel the pain and agony of his victims, the punishment might better fit the crime.

Maybe death on the cross is God’s way of telling us how grievous sin is in His sight. Can we understand how horrible sin is to God? The punishment had to fit the sins we committed to satisfy the justice of God. How can we understand it unless God spoke to us in a language we can understand? Death by crucifixion is the punishment that befits the crimes we committed in our lives; it is just how horrible our sin is viewed by God. The action of Jesus’ suffering and death on the cross speaks louder to us than a thousand words. Yes, our sin is just that bad!

Also, the stark contrast to the darkness of the sins of humanity is the overwhelming, all consuming depth of God’s love. This contrast is why we are so profoundly inspired, touched, moved, and humbled. Not only because of guilt over our sinful nature but even more so because of the magnitude of God’s love and grace for humanity.

Each week as we celebrate the Lord’s Supper can we look at the cross for what it is - an instrument of death, pain and agony, humiliation and shame. Then, can we look past it to see the hideousness of our sins that warranted such a death for Christ? 'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!' (Luke 18:13). The punishment fits the crime but praise be to God for his immeasurable love, we do not have to pay for it.

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Ruby Sisters

2011-06-17T13:21:00.000-04:00

For quite some time, Jennifer, Kenya, Yvonne and I have been considering taking on additional writers for Far Above Rubies. We knew that there were many wonderful Christian women who could help bring the Word to other women and, after much discussion, we approached several women and asked them to join us. Today, I announce to you, loyal readers, our new Ruby Sisters.

Amanda Brazier is an artist and youth minister's wife. She is a graduate of Freed-Hardeman University.

Amy Copas is a librarian and library branch manager. She is the wife of Shannon and mother of 5 year-old Stone.

Jane Hass recently celebrated her 30th anniversary with her husband Nile. They have two grown sons.

Janet Gant is a graduate of Harding University. She and her husband Keith have two grown children and one brand-new granddaughter.

Becky McCormick met her husband Phil at Harding College (now Harding University) where she studied nursing. They have two grown children and she is still adjusting to the "empty nest" years!

Hannah Smith is a recent high school graduate (who was her class salutatorian) and is headed to Freed-Hardeman in the fall. She also writes here.

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The Virtuous Teenage Girl

2011-06-16T15:51:00.000-04:00

I came across this adaptation of Provers 31 by Patsy Norwood of Evergreen, North Carolina, in the January/February 2010 issue of Christian Woman magazine and I thought it would interest the readers here.

- - -

Who can find a virtuous teenage girl? For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her parents safely trusts her; they do not have to worry.
She does her parents good and not evil all the days of her life.
She is eager to learn and works willingly with her hands.
She knows her way around the grocery store and shops for the best buys.
She makes a habit of rising early and prepares herself for the day.
She is careful with her money and makes wise purchases.
She takes care of herself and does not abuse her body.
She does her work thoroughly and does not half-heartedly complete her tasks.
She takes ownership of her tasks and uses determination to complete them.
When she sees someone in need, she does her best to help.
She plans carefully and does not put off or delay what she knows she should do.
She cares for her clothing and makes every effort to have a neat and clean appearance.
She makes her parents proud and brings them great pleasure.
She is industrious and looks for ways to help out.
She is honorable and trustworthy and will reap rewards in the future as a result.
She thinks things through and speaks kindly to others.
She is productive with the use of her time and does not waste it.
Her parents are proud of her and praise her for her efforts.
She realizes that outward beauty is passing and that inner beauty is pleasing to the Lord.
Because of her actions and the choices she makes, she is well thought of and receives much praise.

- - -

That is the gold standard, isn't it? What a virtuous woman this girl would grow up to be! Thoughts?

Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it"

Thou Shalt Move

2011-06-15T01:16:00.000-04:00

A few weeks ago, I got to Bible study extra early. (I should probably repeat that first sentence to inspire us all, right?) Like most busy women, being extra early for church service is a very rare occurrence (I’m embarrassed to say). But this particular Wednesday, I had almost an hour to spare. I sat in the car with my two youngest boys wasting time by playing with my cell phone and listening to the radio. As I played the “Wait Game,” I peeked around the parking lot and noticed that a couple of other families were in their cars doing the exact same thing…waiting.

No one wanted to go in the building too early. I guess everyone has their reasons. It wasn’t that the doors were locked or that we’re forbidden to go in the building before services actually began. But for some reason we were all moved to not move.

After about 20 minutes or so of checking my emails and sending follow-up text messages to family and friends, I decided I would turn the air conditioning off in my car, save some gas, and move toward the building. I figured the worst thing that could happen is that we’d sit in a quiet church auditorium until the multitudes began to arrive.

As we opened the door and entered the lobby, it was easy to see that the church building was still very much asleep. Lights were off and there wasn’t a soul insight. Then suddenly a petite, elderly woman appeared out of the darkness and said “Hello!”

I was surprised to see her. She was a familiar face, but we’d never actually met each other before. Her name was Evelyn Elmore. I thought it was cute that she immediately asked me was I visiting for the first time. I giggled a bit and told her that my family and I had been members for nearly two years now. She laughed too and said that we must sit behind her and that she was always taught that you never turned around to see who’s sitting behind you in church service. I’ve heard that rule too.

As we moved into the auditorium and travelled down the center aisle, we continued to interview each other to get acquainted. Ms. Evelyn has sweet little rituals she does before service begins. She rereads the church bulletin from the previous Sunday to make sure she doesn’t miss any important information. As we got closer to the front, I could see her finger point to pew, and she counted back six rows.
“I always sit on the 6^th row,” she said. “I think we’ve gone down too far.”

I giggle a little more and sit across the aisle on the same row with my sons, BJ and Jackson. I guess I assumed that our precious conversation was over, but I was mistaken. Ms. Evelyn was merely getting her belongings situated on the pew and then she moved over to chat with me a little bit more.

She complimented me on the good behavior of my children and told me about what it was like raising her own two boys. Realizing that we both still had lots more to share about our lives, I stood back up and escorted her back to her seat. I had decided that I would move away from my comfort zone and enjoy the service sitting next to my new friend.

Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives.

Titus 2:3-5 (The Message)

Randomness

2011-05-19T01:35:00.000-04:00

I hope there are still a few Far Above Rubies readers out there. I can’t speak for my co-authors, but I have personally been in a season of self-reflection and self-examination. For a variety of reasons I have simply had no words. I’ve been thinking and meditating about a lot of things, but I’ve had some trouble putting pen to paper, or rather, my fingers to the keyboard. Last night as I was trying to fall asleep, suddenly I had words. Lots of words. Unfortunately the words are a jumbled mess of randomness. I don’t know if you can make any sense of it, but I thought I’d share anyway. Maybe you can relate to some of it or maybe it will just help me focus my thoughts. So, here are some things that have been on my mind the past few months:

Have you ever experienced rejection? It really doesn’t matter how or why you are rejected. The feelings are the same. I’m worthless. I’m no good. I’m invisible. I’m unwanted. I’m insignificant. Anyone ever feel that way? I certainly have. Well, I came across these verses in something I was reading this week. “You whom I took from the ends of the earth, and called from its farthest corners, saying to you, “You are my servant, I have chosen you and not cast you off”; fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:9-10 I am NOT worthless. I am NOT unwanted. I AM CHOSEN!

This year at my church, we have had a different theme each month. The theme for May is “Sharing My Story.” We’ve heard some great stories about dramatic life changes and amazing conversion experiences. I’ve never really thought about having a “story.” Mine is quite simple. I was “raised in the church.” I always knew about Jesus and I always believed in Him. I became a Christian at the age of 19. I don’t have a dramatic story. My day to day life didn’t change that much. I didn’t smoke, cuss, drink or have sex. You know, the “big” sins. I pretty much did what I was supposed to do. As I have matured spiritually, though, I know that the story really has nothing to do with what I did or didn’t do. The important part of the story is what He did for me. Jesus died on the cross, was buried and was resurrected on the third day for my sins just as much as he did it for those with the dramatic life changing stories. My life has changed because of that story. Maybe not as much as some, but I am definitely changed because of Him. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

I’ve mentioned on this blog before that I am involved in a children’s outreach ministry. At this time of the year I become weary. We have one more week until we get a short break for the summer. I am exhausted. I am worn out. I am T.I.R.E.D. You get the point. I love these kids and their families. I love being with them and teaching them about Jesus. I did a gratitude journal with my young girls. I want to share that here sometime soon. They are so precious. They loved listing things they are thankful for. But, I need a break. I need to recharge and reenergize and restore my enthusiasm for this ministry. What makes you weary? How do you recharge?

I have a great story to tell you about one of those women. You know the ones. I’m anxious to share this sweet lady with you. I’ve known her most of my life. Some of you know her. She has done great things for the Kingdom. Please come back and read about her.

We all need a season of quiet reflection, but we also need a season of sharing. I’d love to hear your random thoughts. Please share!!

College Days

2011-02-03T02:45:00.000-05:00

Lately I’ve been reminiscing about my college days. I’ve always said that college is the perfect balance of freedom and responsibility. In order to be successful, you do have to be responsible for your classes. And, like many others, I always had a part-time job during college which required some responsibility. At the same time, though, I always had big chunks of free time. I was blessed to spend most of my free time with great friends. Those friends are what I miss most about college.

I didn’t go away to college. I stayed home and attended UTC (University of TN at Chattanooga). Although it probably would’ve been good for me to go away to college, I am so glad I stayed because here is where I found the UTC Christian Student Center (CSC). The CSC really changed my life in so many ways. It was there that I became more serious about developing my relationship with God. It was there that I went on my first mission trip. It was there that I met people that I am still friends with today, twenty years later. Not just casual friends, but deep, soul mate friends.

We had devotionals a couple of times a week. Those times were the highlight of my week. Spending time in Bible study, in song, and in prayer was uplifting. My faith was strengthened every time I was together with those other Christians.

Relationships were also strengthened during the hours we spent talking, laughing and playing games together. I miss those connections so much. I treasure those times and often wish I could recreate them.

I love my life now and wouldn’t REALLY want to go back, but in this grown up world with a marriage, a mortgage and a real job, I sometimes long for a few of those carefree days.

I want to spend an afternoon making cookies with Stacy or go on a road trip with Julie. I want to spend time in conversation about spiritual things and mundane things. I want my summer to be centered on going to the Navajo Indian Reservation to teach kids about Jesus. I want to dream about my future and wonder where I will live and work and who I will marry.

It’s funny, now I am living in that future dreaming about the past.

I love the future that God has given me. I am so thankful for my college days and all of the other past days, all the people and all the experience in my life. All of that has led me to where I am now.

What are some fun memories from your past?

“There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:”

Ecclesiastes 3:1

Psalm 3

2011-01-29T11:07:00.001-05:00

    A psalm of David. When he fled from his son Absalom.

¹ LORD, how many are my foes!
   How many rise up against me!

² Many are saying of me,
   “God will not deliver him.”

³ But you, LORD, are a shield around me,
   my glory, the One who lifts my head high.

⁴ I call out to the LORD,
   and he answers me from his holy mountain.

⁵ I lie down and sleep;
   I wake again, because the LORD sustains me.

⁶ I will not fear though tens of thousands
   assail me on every side.

⁷ Arise, LORD!
   Deliver me, my God!
Strike all my enemies on the jaw;
   break the teeth of the wicked.

⁸ From the LORD comes deliverance.
   May your blessing be on your people.
(NIV)

Do you ever feel like everyone is against you? I'm sure we all have at one time or another. Here in Psalm 3 we have have an example of David running for his life from his son Absalom, but it was during this that David wrote this Psalm. No wonder he is called the man after God's own heart!

Absalom's army numbered in the tens of thousands (v. 6), but David was able to rest without fear (v. 5). He turned to God and, despite the naysayers (v.2), he knew God would protect him (v. 3) and even bring vengeance on his attackers (v. 7).

Truly, just as God protected David in such a dire situation, we should know that He can protect us as well. "If God is for us, who can stand against us?" (Romans 8:31)

I Want to Pray for You

2011-01-23T09:41:00.000-05:00

I love knowing that we have a Father who longs to hear from us and wants us to ask for His blessings and for His help.

What blessings or help do you need today?

How can I specifically pray for you?

Please leave a comment with your prayer request. If you’d prefer you can send me a private e-mail.

It will be an honor for me to lift your name before Him today.

“Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” ~Hebrews 4:14-16

Meet Loyce Smith

2011-01-03T11:51:00.001-05:00

I have been blessed by being surrounded by some very influential women in my life. Since this blog is “by and for Christian women” I thought I would share some of the wonderful women that have impacted me in some way. Over the next few months you will meet some of the people that I consider to be “heroes.”

They are not particularly remarkable women. They are ordinary women that serve an extraordinary God. Oh, they may have some special skills, talents or abilities that have enabled them to do certain things. But, for the most part, they are just like you and me. They are wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, grandmothers, and friends. Most importantly they are daughters of the King and they seek to serve Him.

Let me first introduce you to Loyce Smith. Loyce and her husband David are currently serving God in Majuro, the Republic of the Marshall Islands. I’ve known Loyce and David for several years. Although we attended the same church for quite some time, I really got to know them a little better when we went on a mission trip together to St. Thomas, USVI. We went there to do a VBS and it was there that I first noticed Loyce’s love for and rapport with children.

My husband and I were honored to have David and Loyce in our home a few weeks ago. They shared some of the wonderful work that they are doing in Majuro.

First, learn a little about them. They have been married for 29 years and have two sons. They just welcomed their first granddaughter. By God’s providence and through a series of events and decisions, David and Loyce made their way to Majuro in July 2008. Their long held dream to serve God on a full-time basis was about to be realized.

I had never heard of Majuro before David and Loyce planned to work there.

Majuro, a coral atoll in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, is the capital city of the Republic of the Marshall Islands. Majuro is approximately 6600 miles from their home in Tennessee. Loyce and David had officially moved to the other side of the world. Not only are they physically on the other side of the world, but in many other ways as well. Here are some facts about Majuro:

Majuro is a matrilineal society which means that lineage is traced through maternal ancestors. Land is passed down to the oldest daughter through the mother. However, in Majuro, everything on the land, including trees, plants, building, etc. belongs to the man.

Unemployment is about 30%. There is no industry there other than copra, or the processing of coconut oil. There are some jobs in the service industry such as hotels, retail stores and taxi service. Others work in government jobs.

The Marshallese diet consists primarily of rice. They have little access to fresh fruits or vegetables. As a result, about 80% of hospital patients have diabetes related illnesses. There are 80-90 amputations per year due to diabetes.

Women are often the victims of spousal, physical, sexual and emotional abuse. Young girls are having babies on a regular basis.

The cultural differences are interesting to me, but what is more intriguing to me is the work that Loyce and David are doing there.

When they arrived, the church there had only two faithful members. A little more than two years later, there are 65-70 people regularly attending their worship service. I asked how they went from two to 65 in such a short time. The answer was simple. Love.

Loyce and David began by loving the children. One of the first things Loyce wanted to do when they arrived in Majuro was to plan a VBS. They had record attendance and from that point on had to have multiple children's classes at their weekly Sunday school. Through their love for the children and the relationships they developed with them, doors were opened and opportunities arose for them to reach out to the adults as well.

They do all the things that missionaries do. They invite and transport people to their services, they have classes and Bible studies outside of the normal church service, they do Vacation Bible School, they go out into the community and knock on doors. They are sharing the Gospel, and obviously the people are responding. In fact, soon after they arrived in the US, they learned that two women had obeyed the gospel. They are anxious to get back and celebrate with those two precious souls! What resonated with me most though, was that one of their goals is to create a sense of family.

Loyce and David are not only sharing the Gospel, but they are living it every day in the way they serve the people. They have weekly classes for the teens as well as for the ladies. Loyce has taught the ladies to sew. They are very skillfully making their own skirts. They have taught the people about good nutrition and helped them incorporate it into their lives. Through these practical acts of love and service, they have cultivated a family among those that worship together each week.

Isn’t that what the love of Christ is all about? Sharing the good news of Jesus with others and then living in fellowship with those that share in the joy of faith and hope in Him. Although there are some vast cultural differences, at some level people are not so different. We all need Jesus and we all desire a loving relationship with Him and with others. Loyce and David may be on the other side of the world, but they are sharing something that is universal.

I’m sure these few words don’t quite do Loyce justice. What I ultimately want to share with you is that Loyce is a faithful child of God living in obedience to Him. I was very encouraged when she and David decided to go to Majuro. I am so thankful for faithful Christians like them that choose to leave home and family in order to expand the borders of God’s Kingdom.

There are challenges to living in a foreign land. Loyce describes Majuro as, “dirty, crowded, noisy and hot.” There is a language barrier that is difficult to overcome. There is some level of desperation and hopelessness among the people. But, with all of that, there is the love of Jesus and the desire to share that love with the Marshallese people.

I asked Loyce if there was anything she specifically wanted to share. Here is what she said, “People tell me they admire what we are doing but I don’t feel I am special because of it. God has truly blessed us, to Him be the glory.”

Amen. To Him be the glory!

Please join me in prayer as Loyce and David prepare to return to Majuro. Pray for their safety as they travel and for the hearts of the people that they serve.

If you are interested in supporting Loyce and David in their work or finding out more about the work in Majuro, you may contact them at davloysmith@gmail.com. They also love to receive “snail mail.” Please send them a card of encouragement to PO Box 1167, Majuro, MH 96960. Postage is the same as letters mailed within the U.S.

“How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!” ~Romans 10:14-15

Happy New Year

2010-12-31T15:38:00.000-05:00

I’m not much of a “new year’s resolution” girl. I find that the resolutions tend to be the same every year. Lose weight. Exercise more. Pray more. Study the Bible more, etc. For a few weeks, maybe even a couple of months, I’m focused on those things, but after a while, my enthusiasm wanes. I stop trying. I end up feeling like a failure. That makes me depressed. I eat. That leads me right back to the beginning, needing to lose weight and exercise more! It’s a never ending cycle.

I do, however, love lists. I’m pretty goal oriented. I like to check things off once they’ve been accomplished. Last year, while I did make a list, I decided to modify my thinking about resolutions. Here is something I wrote then:

Maybe I should define my life goals and use those goals to determine the changes I need to make for 2010. So, here they are, my goals not just for 2010, but for my life:

1. To look forward to heaven and not be fearful to stand before God.
2. To help someone else get to heaven.
3. To live in a state of gratitude.
4. To pray continually.
5. To hide the Word in my heart.
6. To be diligent in everything I do.
7. To love God with my heart, mind, soul, and strength.

I don’t do all of these things perfectly all of the time, but trying to live these goals is much more fulfilling than checking off a laundry list of “resolutions” that seem to come back around every year.

The great thing about the list above is that it is a continual process. It’s not something that I have to do by a certain date or age. I am trying to incorporate these attitudes into my day to day journey. It’s a new life motto. Last year I really tried to focus on the concept of diligence. I want to be intentional and diligent in everything I do. I still have room for improvement, but I am making progress.

This year my focus is on words. First, I want to focus on The Word. I want to immerse myself into God’s Word so much that it becomes a part of me and who I am. I want it to naturally spring from my heart and my lips. I want my speech to be seasoned with Its truths.

I have also been thinking a lot recently about my words. Words have the power to hurt or heal. I want my words to be healing, encouraging and positive. They are not always. I have hurt with my words and have been hurt by the words of others. I want to turn that hurt into healing.

I have been camped on these scriptures recently:

v Matthew 12:36 – “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak,” Ouch! How many careless words have I spoken?? How many people have been hurt by my careless speech??

v Ephesians 4:29-32 – “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Have my words grieved the Holy Spirit? Is there anything worse than grieving the Holy Spirit?

In this new year I want to continue pursuing my goals. I don’t want to simply check things off a list. I want to be continually transforming myself into who He wants me to be. That is the ultimate goal, to be who He created me to be while doing what He created me to do!

How about you? What are you thinking about as we approach 2011?

Happy New Year!

Psalm 2

2010-12-29T14:20:00.000-05:00

¹ Why do the nations conspire
   and the peoples plot in vain?
² The kings of the earth rise up
   and the rulers band together
   against the LORD and against his anointed, saying,
³ “Let us break their chains
   and throw off their shackles.”
⁴ The One enthroned in heaven laughs;
   the Lord scoffs at them.
⁵ He rebukes them in his anger
   and terrifies them in his wrath, saying,
⁶ “I have installed my king
   on Zion, my holy mountain.”
⁷ I will proclaim the LORD’s decree:
   He said to me, “You are my son;
   today I have become your father.
⁸ Ask me,
   and I will make the nations your inheritance,
   the ends of the earth your possession.
⁹ You will break them with a rod of iron;
   you will dash them to pieces like pottery.”
¹⁰ Therefore, you kings, be wise;
   be warned, you rulers of the earth.
¹¹ Serve the LORD with fear
   and celebrate his rule with trembling.
¹² Kiss his son, or he will be angry
   and you and your ways will be destroyed,
for his wrath can flare up in a moment.
   Blessed are all who take refuge in him.

Do you know someone who thinks they know more than God, who thinks their way is better than God's way? Most of us do. Maybe we've even been that person ourselves, but clearly that kind of thinking is vanity, trying to grasp the wind (Ecclesiastes 1:14). How often is pride our downfall? Even as far back as Eden, it was pride - Adam and Eve believing that they knew better than the Lord - that led to their demise.

Often we begin to think we are so good, so smart, that God's love for us becomes a burden - chains and shackles (v. 3) that we want to throw off. This chapter is a clear reminder of how God feels about that kind of attitude. I would never want my Father to scoff at me, to rebuke me, to bring His wrath against me (v. 4-5).

Looking ahead to verse 12: "...blessed are all who take refuge in Him." Blessed indeed! As children of God we stand to inherit all (v. 8), but we must SERVE the Lord, FEAR the Lord and REJOICE in His "burdens".

Click here for the post on Psalm 1.

Cornbread and Bon Bons

2010-12-01T08:10:00.000-05:00

With my husband’s help, I have been compiling a family cookbook. I wanted all the recipes for all of my favorite family dishes. You know the ones. The cornbread your grandmother makes or the chocolate cake that your great aunt makes or your mom’s famous slaw. We all have favorite foods that take us back to special times or remind of us of loved ones.

I was pretty fired up when I started this project………three years ago. It’s taken me that long partly because I’m a procrastinator, partly because all the other things in life tend to get in the way, and partly because my family….LOVES. TO. EAT. I’ve got about 170 pages worth of family recipes so far, with more to go. I am so tired of typing the word tablespoon.

Since it’s quickly approaching that time of year that is filled with family and food, I thought I might share some of my favorite recipes. In sharing the recipes, perhaps you’ll learn something about my family, and, who knows, maybe a little something about me as well. Maybe I’ll even make this a regular part of the blog.

The two recipes I want to share today are from two women very dear to me. The first is my aunt, Donna. Donna was the kind of person that everyone loved. You just couldn’t help but love her. She had a really great sense of humor and was always ready to share a laugh. Much to our shock and devastation, Donna left this world far too soon and far too young. She was 49 years old when a massive heart attack took her from us. I had never really grieved until I lost Donna. Oh, I had experienced loss before, but not quite on this level. I was crazy about her. The moments standing by her graveside saying that final goodbye were some of the saddest of my life. I was happy for her, because Donna was a Christian and I know, without doubt, that she is with the Lord even now. I was so sad for us though, for my uncle, for my cousins, for Donna’s mother and sister and brothers. For her sweet friends that were sharing in that loss. The world lost such a precious soul. I will never forget her influence on my life.

The recipe I most associate with Donna is Broccoli Cornbread. That’s right, Broccoli Cornbread. I think Donna brought it to every family function. Even now, there is usually a pan of this unique cornbread on the table at any holiday celebration.

Broccoli Cornbread

1 package frozen broccoli, thawed, chopped and drained

1 stick butter, melted

1 teaspoon salt

1 large onion, chopped

6 ounces cottage cheese

4 eggs, beaten

1 box Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix

Mix all ingredients. Bake in 9x13 pan in 400 degree oven 25-30 minutes or until brown.

I certainly can’t share family recipes without mentioning my sweet grandmother, my dad’s mother. She loved to cook and, as with most grandmothers, every time we gathered for a meal at her house, there was enough food to feed the neighborhood.

I miss my grandmother most at church. That’s where I saw her the most. She and my aunt and another sweet lady sat in front of me and my immediate family. Sometimes when I walk into the church I still look for her on “her pew.” There are times when I’m surprised that she’s not there.

My grandmother, or Mumsie, as we called her, was a very strong woman. She had, what I would consider, a pretty tough life at times. I never heard her complain though. She had to work hard for most of her life, but she always seemed very content. She handled adversity, like losing a child and a grandchild and having cancer, with grace. It was the third bout with cancer that finally took her life. She was sick and she suffered, but she was at peace. She had lived a full life and she was ready to go home. I remember my mother calling me very early on a Wednesday morning to tell me my grandmother had died. I had been there on Tuesday evening so I knew it would be soon. I remember just feeling very peaceful and thankful that she was finally home. I am so thankful to have had such a godly woman in my life.

There are a lot of favorite “Mumsie recipes” that I could share. I have to say though, that this is one of the top three. I remember these specifically at Christmas and they always disappeared quickly.

Bon-Bons

1 box 10x sugar

1 package coconut

1 cup pecans, finely chopped

1 ½ sticks melted butter

Mix all ingredients together and form balls. Melt 1 package chocolate chips and ½ bar paraffin in top of double boiler. Dip coconut balls into chocolate with toothpick and cool on wax paper.

I hope you’ll try one of these recipes. More importantly though, I hope you are able to spend time with your family during this festive season. Enjoy the food and the fun, but treasure the fellowship. Make lasting memories with those you love!

What are some of your favorite family recipes?

Thankful

2010-11-25T12:29:00.001-05:00

Each in our own words:

Yvonne:

salvation
health
family/hubby/children/etc.
gift of motherhood
home
food
church family
grace - God's patience with me
quiet peaceful life
sunshine/flowers/blankets

Kenya:

friends who are happy to listen to your vents

a gut-busting, tear-dropping laugh

cuddle time with my hubby

sharing an evening swapping stories with my kids

sharing the kitchen with generations of wise women in my family as we prepare for Thanksgiving

a fun, impromptu sing-a-long that the whole joins in on (just makes you smile)

(most of all) God's faithfulness to always give you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it. Why do we worry anyway?

Jennifer:

Fall weather

My patient and loving husband

Godly parents

The sound of the ocean

My church family

Chocolate in any form

Sweet memories of those that are no longer with me

Good health

My job

Friends to laugh with

A loving and forgiving God

Erica:

Grace

Faithful, Christian parents

Loving husband with a great sense of humor and more patience than I deserve

Siblings I can count as friends

Red Maple trees in fall

Amazing brothers and sisters in Christ

Modern medicine

The new door that opens any time an old one closes

Chocolate

Freedom to worship and express myself

Inside jokes

A comfortable home with plenty to eat and a soft, warm bed

New friends

Old friends

In-laws who break every stereotype and are a blessing

The gift of another day

Togetherness is better than turkey, people are more important than pie, gratitude means more than green bean casserole, sharing is greater than shopping, love is above all.

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. - Colossians 3:17

And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. - Ephesians 5:20

Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift! - 2 Corinthians 9:15

Above all today, remember the One to whom all Thanksgiving is due.

We'd love to hear the list of the things for which you are thankful; please share it in the comments.

Psalm 1

2010-11-05T01:33:00.001-04:00

I thought we could use a bit more Bible in our lives - at least, I know I could. So, I am going to be working my way through Psalms and I hope you'll join me.
__________________________________

I am glad to be starting here, Psalm 1 is one of my favorite passages and I come back to it often.

¹ Blessed is the one
   who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
   or sit in the company of mockers,

This verse is clear about who is blessed. I think, as Christians, we are very careful not to walk with the wicked, but perhaps we are not so careful about where or with whom we stand or sit. It is one thing to stand or sit in one place and say, "I cannot help what is around me.", but a very different thing to move ourselves out of those places. 2 Timothy 2:22 tells us, "Flee evil desires of youth, but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart". Obviously, there is more to it than being in one place! We are to FOLLOW the good. I don't know about you, but I don't think I can follow anything by standing or sitting.

² but whose delight is in the law of the LORD,
   and who meditates on His law day and night.

Delight! I love that word. What do you delight in - what do you take pleasure in? If I were to ask you to quickly jot down five things that delight you, would the law of the Lord make the list? My guess is probably not. I'll be honest, that isn't an answer that would come to me. That's when I look at the second part of this verse, "...and who meditates on His law day and night." That's the problem right there. Perhaps my delight would be in the law of the Lord if I were meditating on it day and night.

³ That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
   which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
   whatever they do prospers.

That person - the one who delight's in the law of the Lord and meditates on it day and night - grows, produces, lives. When I feel "withered", could it be because I have stopped taking in the water, the abundant blessings of my Lord?

⁴ Not so the wicked!
   They are like chaff
   that the wind blows away.

Chaff isn't something we really know about these days. The analogy may be lost on some of us in modern times. Chaff is the light, papery husk of cereal grains such as wheat, rice and barley. (That's rice chaff in the photo to the left.) In those days, the chaff was threshed from the grain on the "threshing floor" and then workers would light a fire to one side of the grain and then fan from the other side. The chaff, being light, would blow into the fire while the heavier grain was left on the floor, cleaned and ready to be gathered up. (Matthew 3:12 references this process again, referring to how the Lord will judge and separate, burning the chaff in "unquenchable fire.") The lines are drawn very clearly here. Think back to that tree planted by the water, yielding fruit, not withering and compare it to this dry, dusty husk picked up into the air by a breeze and whisked into the fire, destroyed. Lush, green and clean next to dirty, withered castoff.

⁵ Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
   nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

Again, it is made clear that the wicked are doomed. They are not blessed, there are not fed by the streams of water, they are cast into the fire!

⁶ For the LORD watches over the way of the righteous,
   but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.

Are you letting the Lord watch over your path? Are you letting Him lead you or have you chosen your own way? You can be sure that any way that isn't God's way, is the way of chaff, the way of the wicked, the sinners and the mockers - the way of destruction.

What I Learned (or Re-Learned) This Week

2010-11-01T11:34:00.002-04:00

WILTW is back by popular demand. I hope to have it up every Monday. - Erica

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You reap what you sow. And sometimes you reap what other people sow. Even though you don't like it.
Eyeglasses for children will be broken within the first week.
Even when you're an adult, you may need your mom to tell you the right thing to do.
From now on all banana splits (and anything else) should be made with Blue Bell Groom's Cake Ice Cream.
Verse of the day: “I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people,”- Ephesians 1:18

Clear Vision

2010-11-01T03:43:00.000-04:00

I first had to get glasses about ten years ago. It wasn't long before I switched to contacts. Then, two summers ago, I suffered a corneal abrasion to my left eye. The cause was never found, but, according to eye specialist that I saw twice a week for a month, the surface of my eye had just begun to slough off. Yes, that is just about as much fun as it sounds. I sat in the dark, cold compress on the left side of my face, unable to drive and barely able to walk because I was so off balance, having lost all depth perception, and on pain medication. Time passed and I got better. Now, I am the only one who can still see that that eye doesn't open quite as widely as the other.

Still, even as I healed, I could not bear the thought of putting my contacts back in. Nor did I want to go back to the ophthalmologist. I had had enough of them, I guess. So, time passed. I got a little older and I suddenly realized I'd gone two years without glasses or contacts and I had to squint an awful lot more than I used to. Finally, I returned to the eye doctor and, this week, got my new eyeglasses.

When I picked them up and put them on, I was shocked. I looked out the window, across the highway and I could read the signs on the far side! I had not even known how much I was missing. The condition of my eyes had deteriorated and I hadn't even noticed. In my fear and carelessness, I had put off clarity. It struck me in that moment, standing at the counter, that this didn't apply only to my eyes.

Have you ever been injured and let that drive a wedge between you and clarity, love, grace? Have you let fear, carelessness and procrastination degrade your relationship with the Lord? Or maybe it has prevented you from ever knowing what you are missing, from ever opening your eyes to God.

I pray that your eyes are open, that you do see all He has to offer and that none of us take His many gifts for granted.

Isaiah 35:

⁴ say to those with fearful hearts,
   “Be strong, do not fear;
your God will come,
   he will come with vengeance;
with divine retribution
   he will come to save you.”

⁵ Then will the eyes of the blind be opened
and the ears of the deaf unstopped.

Washed In the Blood

2010-10-29T00:02:00.000-04:00

For some reason my husband and I chose the middle of summer, in the south, to stain our deck. Since we both have demanding full time jobs, we spent several evenings working on this project. On those sweltering humid evenings, with sweat streaming down my face I wondered what in the world we were thinking. Why didn’t we do this in the fall or spring? Oh well, as I was meticulously painting the worn deck, trying to cover all the flaws, I couldn’t help but think about the blood of Christ and the wonderful way that our flaws, or sins are covered.

Our deck is likely original to the house, meaning, at the time of staining, that it was about sixteen years old. It’s seen a lot of wear and tear over the years. It’s been exposed to scorching heat, bitter cold, fierce wind, pounding rain and even some heavy snow. It actually held up pretty well through it all. We didn’t have to replace any boards, steps or rails. It just needed something to make it look new. After the first coat we were pleased and proud of our hard work. Then, we applied the second coat and were amazed at the transformation. This old dirty worn deck looked like new. It’s still not perfect, but the color is better. The stain covered, or least disguised even the worst blemishes on the deck.

Isn’t that what the blood of Christ does for us? Without it we are dirty and worn and beaten down by the world. Our flaws are out there for everyone to see. Once we are washed in that blood, through baptism, we are clean and pure and flawless. The blood of Christ covers our blemishes. It covers our wounds and hurts. It covers our sin. It makes us new.

The bad thing about the deck is that we will have to stain it again. It will face the elements again and will begin to show signs of wear and tear. The flaws will come to the surface. We will have to apply that stain again and again. At some point we may even have to replace some of the boards, steps and rails. See, that deck wasn’t designed to last forever.

The beauty of the blood of Christ is that it is forever. Christ died once and for all. For me. For you. For everyone. Forever.

Unlike the deck, we don’t have to “reapply” the blood of Christ each time we sin. As long as we are in fellowship with Him that blood cleanses us, keeps us clean and pure.

It comforts me to know that I am constantly made new through my relationship with Him.

How about you?

Have you been washed in the blood of Christ?

“But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.” ~ John 1:7

Just Five Minutes

2010-10-08T15:06:00.000-04:00

Today I went outside for a few minutes of peace.

Just five minutes.

My job involves lots of numbers. I like numbers so it’s OK. It’s just that today was intense. I had way too many numbers floating around in my head. I focused on my computer screen until my eyes burned. I needed fresh air, a cool breeze, and a beautiful blue sky. I could see through my window that it was a magnificent day and that outside I would find the peace that I craved. I could almost feel the fresh cool breeze on my face.

Not quite though.

So I escaped.

For just five minutes.

The minute I stepped outside I could feel myself relax just a little. I could feel the release of tired muscles. I could feel the clearing of my cluttered mind. I could feel myself being restored. Just five minutes of quiet time outside on a beautiful day made such an amazing difference. I went back to my desk, to the sea of numbers waiting there, refreshed and energized. It was just enough to get me through the rest of my work day.

I find that time in God’s Word does the same for me. Sometimes I berate myself for not spending enough time in Bible study, and rightfully so. I need lengthy times of Bible Study to stay focused and connected. However, while I crave those times when I can leisurely pour over scripture and meditate on its truths, sometimes I find that just five minutes is enough. It’s enough to leave me refreshed and restored. It’s enough to give me the courage to go on with my day. It’s enough to make a difference.

How about you? What energizes you in the midst of your busy life?

Random Thoughts as I Try to Fall Asleep

2010-09-30T00:15:00.000-04:00

When was the last time we updated FAR? If I can't remember, that's probably not a good sign.
I wonder if most people are as easily distracted as I am...
What am I going to make for dinner tomorrow night? I wonder if I can manage to put off getting groceries for another day. Hmmmmm...no milk, no bread, no bananas...I guess not.
Did I lock the front door? Yes. No. Ugh

.....

Yep, it was locked.
What other errands can I throw in with the grocery trip? Bank. Pharmacy. Library. Yarn Shop.
Is this sore throat and cough EVER going to go away?
I need to make more progress with Katie Grace's schoolwork. I think we're falling behind. Maybe I expect too much.
Did I pray? Yes. No. Yes. I think I'll pray again.

.....

I always feel better after that. I probably don't pray enough. Probably no one does, I think.
Sometimes I think all this free-will isn't all it's cracked up to be.
I don't think the 25 pound dog should be taking up more of the bed than I do.
Tissues with lotion - must remember these tomorrow at the store.

Anyone else ramble on in your head that way? I used to find it annoying, but no more. I realized what a blessing it was to be able to put all my thoughts and concerns into words. In reality, God has given us the ability to settle our minds, bring all our troubles to Him, put everything to bed and then rest. What an amazing God we have!

House Rules

2010-08-23T20:19:00.000-04:00

As I begin to get ready for a new school-year, I always try to get things in good working order in other matters as well. Just today I began tweaking our House Rules a little bit. When I began making our House Rules, my younger daughter was just learning to read, and I had to keep things very simple. As time went on, it got more and more complicated. Now, however, I have found that simpler is better. I was able to break down everything so that it fit under four basic rules. I thought some of you might be interested in using our house rules and/or modifying them to suit your family's needs, so here they are:

ANDERSON FAMILY HOUSE RULES

1. LOVE the LORD (Mark 12:30)

God loves you; Jesus died for you. Respect the love you have been shown.
Love and obey God and all other things will fall into place.
Choose to be thankful and content.
Pray.

2. LOVE ONE ANOTHER (John 13:34-35)

Honor and obey your parents with a respectful attitude.
Serve, encourage and forgive one another.
Treat others the way you want to be treated.
Be generous.
Be a peacemaker.
Be honest and kind.
Give help cheerfully when you see it is needed; accept help graciously when it is offered.

3. LOVE YOURSELF as a CREATION of GOD (1 Corinthians 6:19)

Choose to be joyful and patient.
Do what you know is right, regardless of what others say.
Exercise self-control in every kind of situation.
Ask before you act if you are ever unsure.

4. BE a LOVING STEWARD of GOD'S GIFTS (Matthew 25:14 - 30)

Use our resources wisely.
Complete your assigned tasks with a cheerful heart.
Take initiative to help without having to be asked.

Remember to show J.O.Y.!
J - Jesus first
O - Others second
Y - Yourself last

My Broken Heart

2010-08-18T14:06:00.001-04:00

I think I’ve mentioned on this blog before that I am involved in an outreach ministry at my church. We go out into the community and pick up about twenty children and bring them back to the church for a Bible class. This past week was our VBS so we picked up our “community kids” every night. I had an opportunity to spend a little more time with them than normal both during class and on the ride to and from the church.

I think I’ve also mentioned that these kids deal with more issues on a day to day basis than I have in my forty years of life. This week we talked about two fathers. One died two weeks ago. The other went to jail about a month ago. In both cases the children are left without their father. The one that went to jail will be there for years this time rather than months. Since we’ve known the kids, this is his third time to be arrested. Several of the kids are related so these events were fresh on all their minds. The funeral for the other father was only days before VBS began. I spent a few minutes on two of the evenings talking about these things and more with one of the moms. She is overwhelmed. So am I. It is very sobering to hear a nine year old boy talk about the details of the last few hours of his father’s life. His father was 32 years old. Basically, he died as a result of drug and alcohol abuse. His son said to me, “I just wish he was still here.” I do too.

Our “normal” Bible class time is on Monday night. From the time we pick up the kids, have our class and take them back home, we’ve spent a maximum of two hours with them. We have two hours a week with these children. Our message, the gospel and the love of Christ, is competing with all the other “messages” they get during the week. They are inundated with information from parents, friends, school, television, etc. We have to push through all of that and hope that the gospel penetrates their little hearts before they are hardened by the world.

There have been many Monday nights that I’ve headed home with my heart broken into a thousand pieces because of the stories they tell. On other nights their behavior is so bad that I leave thinking, “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t do this. I can’t do this.” I’ve driven home with tears streaming down my cheeks because I just don’t know what to do. Sometimes it seems we’ve made no progress at all. I’ve driven home asking God, “What is the purpose in all this? What are we supposed to be doing with these kids?” So many times I want to just give up and quit. Thankfully, somehow, someway God always brings me back to the broken place in my heart where I am so in love with these children. I want nothing more than to be a small light in the dark world in which they live. At the age of nine or ten years old they are already beaten down by the world. They are living out the consequences of the bad choices their parents have made. That is the hardest part for me. These kids could have better lives if only their parents made better choices. That nine year old boy might have his dad if his dad had never taken that first drink or smoked that first cigarette!

Ultimately all we can do is to continue to tell them the greatest story they will ever hear. Hopefully the details of that story will weave into the details of their story. I know for sure that I have to keep loving them and speaking God’s Word to them. His Word and His Story never return void.

One of my co-workers in this ministry said just last night, “if only one of these children is saved, our ministry will have been a huge success.” Amen!

“And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.”

--Galatians 6:9

Hey, That's Not Fair!

2010-08-06T03:27:00.000-04:00

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Editor's Note:
I would like to apologize to you, our loyal readers, for our absence in the month of July. It was entirely my fault. As we know, to everything there is a season and, apparently, July is not the season for keeping up with a blog - at least not for me. As the days cool and life settles back into it's rhythm, I hope, with help of my amazing co-writers, to bring you more regular updates and additional improvements that we may all further glorify our Lord. ~ E.A.
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I do not know what to write. Those who know me, know that things roll around my head a long time and I preach to myself all day long. Now, thanks to this blog, I not only preach to myself, but to you as well. :) It is a good challenge have an outlet for the things I’m trying to get into my head/heart. By writing this, I invite you to take the journey with me.

I will paraphrase a question that was recently asked pertaining to marriage. “How do you not let your spouses faults get under your skin?” or “How can I learn not to bear a grudge when they violate MY standard of living?” or “When is service to my spouse just too much to bear?” All three questions are really variations on one theme. I will confess that I am not perfect in this area, but God’s word is perfect and so through it we can have the direction we need(2 Tim 3:16-17).To begin, we must realize that life is not fair. Nope, the Creator of the world living here on Earth in a perfect manner and being killed for my sin is not fair (Phillipians 2:6-8). Jesus endured trickery, lies, beating, mocking, head wagging, and even slow, painful death by those who claim to love God when He could have stopped it. Simply put, God’s grace isn’t fair.

Did you know that we aren’t called to be fair? We are called to present our bodies as a living sacrifice (Romans 12:1). We are called to love. Now that we have our eyes on Jesus, we’ll have the perspective necessary to answer the question in a right way, one that brings honor to our Lord.

Let’s rephrase the question. “What are we not willing to joyfully bear in order to bring glory to God?” A spouse who lets the grass grow too long? One that doesn’t pick up his shoes? One that expects us to bag a lunch for them day after endless day? After the burden that Christ lifted off our shoulders any burden we bear for others is light in comparison. Did He not wash the dirty feet of a dozen men to teach us a lesson about servitude? You see, when we stand on our “rights” and declare that it’s just too much for us, that we don’t deserve to be treated with such disrespect and we’re not going to put up with it any longer, we are not being poor in spirit. In fact, we are making ourselves greater than Christ. When we complain to ourselves and to others because our spouse walks on our freshly mopped floors with muddy shoes, we are making ourselves greater than Christ. He never once complained during His suffering.

Who was made for whom? Often, when I am frustrated with my spouse, it’s because I forget our roles. I expect him to support my whims, goals, dreams, expectations, and lifestyle when my role from creation has been to be his helper (Genesis 2:18).

Other times my frustration is from the unbiblical notion that marriage should be 50/50. I tend to look at my 50% and wondering why he isn’t helping me with it. But, Colossians 3:23-24 tells me “Whatsoever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” If I am only putting 50% into my marriage, then I am only giving the Lord 50%.

Ideally, Christians marry each other and help each other grow closer to God causing them to grow closer to one another. They are gentle, patient, kind, loving, and submissive to one another. But, sometimes we live outside of the ideal. Sometimes a spouse drifts from the Lord causing a tremendous schism between husband and wife (2 Corinthians 6:15). Then what? 1 Peter 2:19+ offers this help “For this is a gracious thing, when, mindful of God, one endures sorrows while suffering unjustly… For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in His steps… He himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness.” It is through remembering what God has done for us that we can humble ourselves and endure injustice. The good news is that we don’t put up with it forever. We are “children…heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him…the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:17+) I can’t think of a better ending than that!

I’ve got a LONG way to go in this area, but now that I know God’s expectations and that He can give me the ability to carry out His will, I’m ready to change direction.

Classic Cars, Serving Dishes and Talents

2010-06-29T01:05:00.000-04:00

Last week when I was working out I overheard the following conversation between two guys that were in
the gym.

Guy #1 – “Hey is that your mustang out there in the parking lot?”
Guy #2 – “Yes.” He went on to tell the model and other details about the car that really meant nothing to
me due to my lack of knowledge of (or interest in) classic cars.
Guy #1 – “That’s a great car. Do you drive it often?”
Guy #2 – “No. It’s only got 44,000 miles on it. I usually keep it in the garage. My son’s car is in the shop
so he had to drive another one of our cars.”
Guy #1 – “You wouldn’t let him drive that one?”
Guy #2 – “No way. I’m not letting him drive it. I can’t wait to get it back home in the garage and put the
cover back on it.”

What? Put it back in the garage and put the cover back on it? Seriously? Apparently, to the trained
eye, this is a really nice car. Yet, he wants to keep it covered up in his garage. Why have it at all?
OK, I totally get why he does that. I’m not very schooled in cars, but I do work at a Convention Center
and we have an annual car show. I’ve seen these people before. They spend hours with a bottle of
Windex on a car that has never seen the light of day. Most of the cars are driven out of a trailer when
they arrive at the exhibit hall. The owners have this wonderful treasure that they are proud of and they
kind of want to show it off, but don’t you dare touch it. And, please don’t let it rain (or snow..the show is
always in January) before, during or after the show.

Of course, when I heard this conversation, I immediately thought of the parable of the talents and
the “one talent man.” He certainly took good care of his talent. He didn’t squander it or use it frivolously.
Surely he had good intentions. The Bible tells us that he was afraid so he hid it in the ground. He didn’t
want to lose what he’d been entrusted with. However, the other two servants did the exact opposite.
They put their money to work and doubled it. As a result they were entrusted with even more. If you’ve
read this account in the Bible you know what happened to the “one talent man.” His plan for holding onto
that one talent was not a good one.

I can relate somewhat to “Guy #2” and even the “one talent man.” I have a beautiful glass serving
dish that belonged to my great-grandmother. It probably doesn’t have any real monetary value, but
to me it has great sentimental value. I rarely use it because I don’t want it to get broken. It sits on my
kitchen counter most of the time, just holding potatoes or onions. I’m hesitant to take it to a church
potluck or even a family get together. It’s special to me because it represents a connection to a special
person in my family. I’m afraid that using it will ruin it. I wonder what my great-grandmother would
think about that. Would she be sad or disappointed because I haven’t really enjoyed the serving dish?

What about God? How does He feel when he sees us burying our “talents?” He’s given us each unique
personalities, skills, abilities, interests and desires. If we focus on these and channel them in the right
direction we can do amazing things for His Kingdom. However, when we ignore the gifts He has given us
we are just like the “one talent man.” If we don’t use what we’ve been given we can’t grow.
Not only will we not grow, but like the “one talent man” we are risking our eternal salvation by not obeying
God and using what he’s given us.

How are you using your “talents"?

Matthew 25:14-30

Good Works

2010-06-14T14:42:00.000-04:00

While my daughters and I were reading Titus the other day, we couldn’t help but notice how often Paul referred to good works. The phrase that really stuck was “be ready for every good work.” What does that mean? How can I? Don’t good works usually present themselves when you’re already in the middle of chaos? Since it takes all of my effort just to maintain the status quo, can I really plan for good works? I will admit that I am not quick to make connections. All day I meditated on that verse to try to figure out how that concept is applied. That evening while talking with my hubby I found myself answering my own question.

To be ready for every good work involves skill. What I am able to do, prepares me to serve. If I am able to cook, then I can serve by bringing food to elderly or sick people. If I am able to drive, then many needs could be met through driving. My home could be a place of providing fellowship through hospitality. Since any skill can be used to the glory of God, it is worthwhile to cultivate skills so that I can be “ready.” Some people buy or make cards of sympathy or encouragement in bulk so that they will be ready. Some stock up on homemade frozen meals or always keep ingredients in the pantry so that they may be prepared to host out-of-town Sunday visitors. Fasting and prayer on behalf of someone is not only a great service to them, but service to God. Smiling, saying a kind word, or simply holding your tongue when you don’t feel like it can also be good works. Certainly, older women teaching younger women to love their husbands and children, is a good work.

Attitude is integral to being “ready for every good work.” It involves willingness and selflessness. To be sure, it is rarely convenient to partake in good works. Occasionally, good works require something that’s easy to give, but I think that is the exception. They involve some sort of sacrifice of time, money, or effort; but can become a lifestyle, thus lessoning the difficulties as the above examples show.

Okay, I’ll confess. There once was a time when I didn’t know how to do good works without being directly tied to a ministry. Once my first child was born, all my work with ministries (which I loved) came crashing to an end. Here I was for the first time in my life (since age 3), living within the home without extrinsic motivations such as school, a job, or a ministry. None of the ministries seemed to fit this new Mommyhood lifestyle. I didn’t know what to do with myself and I longed to understand God’s purpose for my life. This was a difficult period. During that time I remember having lunch with a friend and mentioning that although I don‘t know my purpose, I do know that God gave me my husband and my daughter and so perhaps that is where I ought to start. Over the course of the next year my Grandmother became ill and passed away, I was ministered to by some women in the congregation whose actions and words were an example during that trial. They weren’t a part of a formal ministry and never stood out, so until then, I didn’t know their function within the body. Through their actions, I finally understood that good works could be done both in and out of organized ministries.

The scriptures make it clear that if we are God’s own we are commanded to do good works, but I wonder if God sometimes allows us to incubate for a time. Remember David so much wanted to build a temple for God, but God did not allow it. When I had to abandon all the ministries that I once worked with, that’s how I felt. God did allow David to start accumulating materials for the building. That’s how it was when I began turning my attention towards home. In those days I didn’t cook. I was no good at it. My mouth didn’t water when I read a recipe because spices seemed to me like a foreign language. Neither was I any good at housekeeping. I’ve never been tidy and I simply don’t like to clean. That’s a bad combo. However, I learned to be intrinsically motivated and do what needs to be done. Through the grace of God, I am more than I ever thought I could be. It wasn’t only what I learned to do though; it’s about who I’ve become. During the period that I didn’t think I was doing anything, I was becoming more like my Lord and Savior. I began the journey of leaving laziness, selfishness, and indulgence behind. This will likely be a lifelong struggle for me, but I’m on the road and I have joy in my heart. I am no longer lost and uncomfortable at home, but grateful to have learned God’s way for me.

Even if I’ve developed all kinds of skill in order to do good works, if I don’t make the time, I’ll never do them. This means that as a good steward, I will learn time-management. In order to keep our days as flexible as possible, I limit our classes. While my girls have taken some music, dance, art, etc. I try to keep our commitments to a minimum. If we have to chuck home school for a time so that we may participate in a good work, then we let it go. I have faith that God will prosper our education if He is put first. We can always make school work up another day, but opportunities lost cannot be made up. Learning is good, but Righteousness is better.

Oh yeah, stuff… I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that stuff could also be a tool for good works. What stuff to you have that might be used to benefit others? If you have so much mammon that you only have time to serve it, then it’s time to let some of it go. Otherwise, use and enjoy what you have for the glory of God.

In summary, all that I have, am, and can do, He is able to use and multiply. Please, don’t think this is an inclusive exposition; it is just my thoughts. I’d love to hear what you do to be ready.
^{^{1. Titus 3:1
2. Luke 2:37}3. I Sam 2:30b, Jn 12:26}

Adoption Part 4: Lessons Learned

2010-06-10T12:43:00.000-04:00

Read Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3

We knew it could happen this way. We thought we were prepared for all the possibilities. We thought we would be OK if she decided to keep the baby. After all, it was her baby. She had every right to change her mind at the last minute. It didn’t matter that we’d made a huge emotional investment, not to mention a pretty substantial financial one. She looked at her baby and she just couldn’t let go.

Needless to say we were devastated. We had made an emotional connection with the baby. As far as we were concerned this was our baby. We had just lost our baby. We have never experienced pregnancy, miscarriage or the death of a child, but for us it was like a death. We grieved as if it were a death. I have never before or since felt grief like I did then. In the beginning it was physical. I felt as if an elephant was on my chest and I literally couldn’t breathe. I thought I would never feel normal again. Time has certainly lessened the grief but it never completely goes away. Even now as I write this I feel the grief coming to the surface and if I allowed myself, I could succumb to it for a few hours or even a couple of days. I could wallow in my grief and ask, “Why me?” I’ve certainly spent some time doing that in the past three years.

I could write a book about this and about the feelings I had and the lessons I learned. I’m not sure why I decided to share it here on the blog, but it’s been on my mind more this year than the previous two. I needed to write it down and reflect on it this time. Perhaps some of the lessons I learned will be helpful to someone else that may be going through a difficult experience.

I learned that I am stronger than I think. It was hard, the hardest thing I’ve ever been through, but I survived.

I learned that my marriage is as strong as I hoped it would be in a crisis. We survived something difficult together and came out stronger on the other side. We never blamed each other or were angry with each other. We relied on each other during the grief and sadness and loved each other more for it.

I learned that my faith is as strong as I hoped it would be. I certainly had, and sometimes still have some questions for God, but I never lost faith in Him and His power. I know that, while I may not understand it in this life, He had a reason for putting us in this situation and working it out the way He did. I was confused at times, but never angry at God.

The greatest lesson I learned is that God is in control. He has a plan and His plan is always best. A couple of things that happened during this experience really tested my faith. The first has to do with diapers. We knew that we would have to buy a few things in preparation for the baby. Clothes were easy. They were cute and fun. Even formula was easy. I mean, I knew the baby had to eat so I took some advice from friends and bought a small can of the recommended formula. The diapers though. Oh my goodness. I would stand in front of the sea of diapers and I was just so overwhelmed. I must’ve gone to buy diapers half a dozen times. I never could bring myself to do it. There were so many brands and sizes and I just didn’t know what to choose. One day when I was praying about this I really felt that God was telling me that not buying the diapers was a lack of faith. I was not trusting Him. I finally got up enough courage and faith to buy a few diapers.

Another thing that really stands out to me is that after she decided to keep the baby and we had to tell the story over and over again, people would say, “Oh well, I guess that’s for the best.” At first this made me really angry. I thought, “How dare you say that to me? You have no idea what this child is facing. This woman left her child in a crack house. She’s lost custody of one child already. We know nothing about this baby’s father because he drifts from crack house to crack house and no one can find him. The grandmother has been in jail because of drugs. Another family member died trying to get off drugs. Oh yeah, the baby is in a much better situation with her than with us.” I knew that people meant well and didn’t really know what to say, but it was so hard for me to hear that. I selfishly wanted the best thing to be for the baby to be with me and my husband.

I still believe that by not buying diapers I was showing a lack of faith. I also still believe, even though I ended up not needing the diapers, that buying them was an act of faith. And, once I came out of the ocean of grief and pain and confusion, I understood that it was best that she kept the baby. It’s for the best because I prayed, oh how I prayed, for that baby and that mother and for me and my husband. I prayed that God’s will would be done and that His purposes would be served in this situation. I believe with all my heart that His will was done and that His purposes were served.

I didn’t feel that way overnight. It has taken time and prayer and faith to be able to say that. But, I do believe that He put us in that situation for a reason. I still don’t completely understand. I think, if for no other reason, God knew that she needed a prayer warrior. I pray for the mother and that precious baby and the other children very often. I pray that the mother has taken the opportunity to make some positive changes in her life. I pray that the baby motivated her to do what she needed to do for herself and her family. If her life and the lives of her children are better because she almost gave her baby away, then I’m thankful to have been part of that process.

The experience opened my heart to adoption. It wasn’t something we ever considered before and we haven’t pursued another adoption. However, we haven’t ruled it out either. There are so many families out there in crisis and so many unwanted children. If we were approached with the same situation today, even knowing the potential for heartache, we would do it all again in a minute.

“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

Adoption Part 3: Phone Calls

2010-06-06T14:28:00.001-04:00

Read Part 1 and Part 2.

The second time we spoke with the birth mother was a stormy night in June. We were to call her from our home at a specific time. Our power was out so we sat on our sofa in the dark and called her using a cell phone. We had the best conversation with her. We asked her a lot of questions about the adoption and how she felt about it. She seemed to feel really great about it. She admitted that she just felt she couldn’t take care of another child. We spoke to her mother (at the time they were living together and the mom actually had custody of one of the older children) who also seemed very positive about us and the adoption. We allowed both of them to ask anything they wanted of us. Her only real request of us was that we send her photos. We assured her that we would send her photos and that we would tell her child about her and the love that motivated her decision.

My husband and I agreed early on in the process that we would be as open as possible with the baby about the adoption and about the birth mother. We knew that if our child ever wanted to meet her that we would encourage that and would help in any way in finding her at that time.

By this point, she was at the very end of her pregnancy. Physically there were signs that the baby was coming soon. When we spoke to her on the phone she was to go to the doctor later that week. She was to call the counselors and let them know how the appointment went. We had spoken to her about what would happen when she went to the hospital and who she would call and how all of that would work. We had a contact at the hospital and would be informed of the birth. After that second phone call we knew that we would likely never speak to her again. We would have a room in the hospital. The baby would be born and would be brought straight to us. Unless she specifically requested to speak with us, our contact with her at that point would be only through the attorney.

Those last few days we went through each day anticipating that phone call. We never went anywhere without our phones. We had our home phone and our cell phones by our bedside. Each time the phone rang we just knew it was time.

It seemed like we would wait forever. Finally we got the call.

It wasn’t the middle of the night phone call that we had anticipated where we would hurry and pull on some clothes and grab the newly packed diaper bag and the small gift we had for the mother and rush to the hospital. No this call was the one that we dreaded. This was the call where we found out that she just couldn’t do it. She could not give her baby up for adoption.

The second time we spoke to her was on either a Monday or Tuesday evening. She was to go to the doctor later that week. Well, we found out that the baby was born on that Friday. She did not contact anyone until the following Tuesday.

To be continued ...

Adoption Part 2: Exciting and Frustrating

2010-05-29T17:41:00.000-04:00

Read part one here.

The date that I got the initial phone call was May 10. The baby was due mid to late June. Yikes. We had six weeks to prepare for something that most people have months to prepare for. We needed a crib, a car seat, diapers, formula and countless other things that I never even knew existed, much less that I needed. Thanks to the kindness of friends and family we got most of what we needed pretty quickly and FREE. We were given or loaned all of the essentials.

We started getting excited. We only shared this with family at first. There was a great risk in telling too many people. We knew that she might not follow through with her decision. We also wanted the process to be as confidential as possible. It was so hard to keep this secret. We were bursting with joy over having a child and so wanted to share it with everyone. Finally we did share it with our Sunday school class at church and our co-workers. It didn’t take long for the news to spread and we were overwhelmed at how others were sharing in our joy.

The time we spent on this journey was an emotional roller coaster like I have never experienced before or since. Most of the time, we were just like any other happy expectant parents. We made plans, picked out a name, bought a few items we needed. Other times we felt very frustrated with the process. We had to deal with the counselor, the attorney, the hospital, and the financial obligations.

In the midst of all of this we were constantly aware of the problems the birth mother was facing. She had two other children, but there was no father present for any of them. Drug and alcohol abuse had been a big part of her life. Not just personally for her, but several family members as well. She was unable to care for the two older children and certainly not prepared to take care of a third child. We were concerned for her and for her entire family. We hoped that she would see how unselfish it was for her to choose adoption for her baby. I wrote her a letter, one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, and thanked her for giving us this opportunity and assured her that her baby would be loved and cared for, not just by us, but by our friends and families as well.

Initially we never planned to speak directly with her. We communicated through the counselors and attorneys and in writing. However, she requested a phone conversation. It took place in the counselor’s office. She was put on a speaker phone and we had a short conversation with her. Hearing her voice was a very emotional thing for me. Knowing what she was giving up and what I would be gaining because of her sacrifice was quite sobering.

As the weeks went on we hoped and prayed and prepared as much as you can prepare in such an uncertain situation. She requested a second phone call and at that time we felt really good about our decision and about her decision.

To be continued…

Adoption Part 1: The Beginning of the Journey

2010-05-21T14:01:00.000-04:00

This time of year is always bittersweet for me. I love the newness of spring and the warmth of the sun. However, I will forever associate this time of year with a difficult experience in my life. Three years ago my husband and I tried to adopt a baby.

It happened on an early spring day. It was a Thursday. I was at my desk at work when I received the phone call. There was a young mother expecting a baby. For various reasons she was considering adoption. Would we be interested? Since we had not been seeking adoption and had never discussed adoption this came as quite a surprise. My immediate reaction was, “of course we’re interested.” But, I knew that I had to speak with my husband first. At the time I was involved in something at my church that kept me away from home until later that night. I knew this wasn’t a conversation to be had over the phone so I anxiously awaited the end of my day so that I could speak with my husband.

While he is naturally a bit more cautious than I and had some doubts, we discussed it and decided we wanted to know more. It’s not every day that someone calls and wants to give you a baby. Again, we had to exercise extreme patience by waiting until the following Tuesday until we could get some details.

We walked into the meeting filled with questions about the situation and the process. We had absolutely no idea what we were getting into or really if we even wanted to proceed. Sure, we would love to have a child, but never thought this would be the route we would take. After the meeting, while we had some pertinent info, we were still filled with questions and concerns. I remember, though, that we went to dinner after our meeting and we sat there and both said, “How can we know what we know about this child and NOT do this?” From that point on, we still had questions along the way, but we never doubted the decision to take this child into our home and raise him or her as our child.

That day we embarked upon a journey that changed us forever.

To be continued….

Christian Diseases (Part 2)

2010-05-12T18:48:00.000-04:00

Spiritual Diseases (Part 2)

Ever been diagnosed with any of these? Take honest inventory…not to hurt from it, but to heal. It’s amazing how the Holy Spirit can convict you (in this case, me) in such a way that not only ministers to others, but to yourself as well.

Thin Skin Infection

Symptoms: Everything hurts her feelings. She’s easily offended and often holds silent grudges against others.

Results: People are uncomfortable talking to her...you never know what her reaction

will be, lacks close relationships, can be moody

Treatment:

Eliminate insecurities by lovingly talking to people to make sure you understand them
Learn to overlook minor nuisances, nobody’s perfect
Decide to forgive others no matter what it takes

Put up with each other. Forgive the things you are holding against one another. Forgive, just as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13

Self-Centered Syndrome

Symptoms: She can be a bit bratty. She always wants everything to go her way. She lacks flexibility in many areas and has a tendency to be bossy.

Results: Tends to be less involved in church activities when she’s not in charge, runs off

genuine workers who just want to serve, brings down working morale of group project participants

Treatment:

Practice being a team player, but letting others lead the committee
Train others to take on your traditional tasks
Pray to have a more humble heart
Set a weekly goal to do something for someone else and look for nothing in return

An unfriendly man pursues selfish ends; he defies all sound judgment. Proverbs 18:1

Humility Dysfunction

Symptoms: She can be very “puffed-up” at times. She thinks she knows “everything.” She rarely takes advice and feels she knows the bible better than anyone.

Results: Others find it difficult to talk to her, she’s perceived as being “fake,” lacks meaningful friendships

Treatment:

Continue to study the bible and realize even Paul struggled (Romans 7:18-21)
Put others before yourself by giving your time to those less fortunate...volunteer at a homeless shelter or give your designer clothes to the needy
Practice giving compliments to others
Welcome constructive criticism with sincerity

Do you see a man wise in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him. Proverbs 26:12

What Are You Trying to Prove?

2010-05-10T13:44:00.000-04:00

A couple of weeks ago my friend and I were returning from spending the weekend at our church’s women’s retreat. It was an encouraging and uplifting time, but also an emotional one. See, we looked deeply at ourselves and at some things that we might need to change. My friend and I are quite different, but we share a similar struggle. On our way home, we were discussing the differences and similarities of our struggle. She is very outgoing, sometimes to the point that she feels she says too much. Or, she says the wrong things. I, on the other hand, am very quiet in most situations. I don’t say enough or share enough of myself with others. Though we are on the opposite ends of that spectrum we share the same feelings of inadequacy that come when we measure ourselves by the wrong standard. She said, “It’s hard to be yourself and try to prove yourself at the same time.” I knew exactly what she meant the minute she said it. I feel the same way. If I’m really my true self, if I show people the real me, what will they think? If I bear my soul to those that (I assume) have it all together and they find out that I don’t have it all together, how will they react?

My response to my friend, was, “I think that’s the problem. We are trying to prove something.” What are we trying to prove and to whom are we trying to prove it? I think a lot of women feel this way to some degree at different points in their lives. We value ourselves by our weight, our clothes, our hair, our homes, our jobs, our kids, our bank accounts, and on and on…….. We compare ourselves to others. In some cases we compare ourselves to those we think are less attractive, righteous, or successful in order to elevate our status in our own eyes. At other times we compare ourselves to those we think are more attractive, righteous or successful and we end up feeling ugly, guilty and flawed. Neither comparison is accurate or healthy. Our true measure of ourselves should come from God’s Word and His standards, not our own.

God tells us that we are created in His image (Genesis 1:27). How then could we possibly be ugly or flawed? We, in our sin and imperfection, are so valuable to God that He gave His Son to die for us. Other people around us may look at us and judge us by our outward appearance, but God looks at our hearts (I Samuel 16:7). We have nothing to “prove” to Him. Psalm 139 tells us that He knew everything about us before we were born. He knows the number of hairs on our heads. He even knows our thoughts before we think them. And yet, He still values us enough that He sacrificed His Son for us.

The human part of me will always struggle with self-image issues. However, the divine nature that I possess through Him continually reminds me that my true self-worth comes from who I am in Him, not who I am in this world. I will never measure up to the standards of this world. But by His standards I am holy and blameless (Ephesians 1:4).

I’d much rather have that than a perfect home, beautiful body or hefty bank account.

Are you trying to prove something?

At All Times

2010-05-04T14:51:00.000-04:00

A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for adversity.
Prov 17:17

This is a verse that I got to experience last weekend while I was at our church’s ladies retreat. I was looking forward to hearing all the wonderful speakers and being challenged and bonding with other Christian women. Friday night started out great; but, before dawn on Saturday I was running to the bathroom.

The dreaded stomach flu struck. My Christian sisters brought water and Sprite to my hearts content, prayed for me, visited even during the thunder storm, called my hubby (who happened to be in the same predicament) to check on him and the children, packed my belongings, took me home, stocked the refrigerator with fluids, fed my children, spent the night, called in the morning, brought lunch the next day. Even a brother stopped by with a bag of juice and a bag of fruit because he noticed that we weren‘t in the worship assembly and thought we might be in need. In essence, when we were completely helpless, they thoroughly cared for us. When I spoke to one of the women who had done so much for me, she simply said, “That’s just what family does.” Words cannot express how thankful I am for what Kim, Sandy, Kenya, Denise, Brian, and others did for our family. Thank you for your care. I am so grateful to be a part of the body of Christ.

Power Steering

2010-04-25T17:15:00.001-04:00

This past weekend I was asked to speak at my congregation's annual ladies' retreat. I was terrified, having never spoken in public before, but I feel I did pretty well. Our theme was "Power Surge" and my topic was "Power Steering: Letting God Drive" and I'd like to share it with you all now.

__________________________________

Several years ago, when I was about 20, my husband and I bought our first car together. We were young and broke so we went to one of those little “buy here – pay here” places. We had two requirements: that it be cheap and easy on gas. We found what we were looking for (and then some) in an adorable little Mercury Capri 5 speed convertible. Not the most practical of cars, but again, we were young (and, as often goes hand in hand with being young, dumb). Having never driven a manual transmission before, the dealer had to teach me how to drive it while on our test drive. It was then that I learned that the car had no power steering. “It's so small, it doesn't need it!” the dealer explained. “Oh, of course”, I said, “that makes sense.” (I told you I was young and dumb right?) SO, long story short, we bought it. Now imagine for a moment that you are completely new to driving a 5 speed and, at the same time, you are having to pull and push and turn this steering wheel with all the might in your left hand. It didn't go well. Getting around on the curvy, hilly terrain where we live was difficult to say the least. But we accepted it, what else could we do? This car just didn't need power steering. After a while it was time for some regular maintenance of some sort and the mechanic said, “You know the car is out of power steering fluid, right?” We were dumbfounded. All this car needed was the addition of this certain red liquid and it became easy to drive. Curves in the road were no problem for the little convertible anymore: Now it had POWER STEERING. Isn't that us? Struggling down life's road until another certain red liquid, the blood of Jesus Christ, make curves in the road easier for us to handle, too.

What is Power Steering in our lives?

Let's start with the steering:

Dictionary.com defines the word “steer” as “to guide the course of something in motion by rudder, helm, wheel, etc.”

Guide the course –

What guides our course on a daily basis? Are we the ones at the wheel, pushing and pulling and turning with all our might? Do we try to control our lives and the direction we're going? Oh, we know what we want and we know the path to get there – and yet we wonder why that path is so littered with obstacles. In Psalm 25:5, David writes “Guide me in Your truth and teach me, for You are God, my Savior, and my hope is in You all day long.” and later in chapter 48:14 “For this God is our God forever and ever; He will be our Guide even to the end.”

In my research, I came across a book called Answered Prayers: Love Letters from the Divine by Julia Cameron. In it, Ms. Cameron attempts to say what God would say to us in answer to our prayers. While I can't say I agree that she's speaking for God, one passage did jump out at me and I can imagine God whispering these words to me.

“You put Me at a distance. You want to run your own life and then you wonder at its emptiness...You imagine you are alone. This is never true. When you wake up, I am there. My hands are ready to hold your day...There is nothing too large or too small for Me. I am ready to hold it all...You fear your future. Why? I will be there. I will lead you step-by-step as I lead you now – when you allow me. Wake with Me in the mornings. Place your days in My care. Allow Me to shepherd you. Permit Me to be your guide. I am with you always.”

In Genesis 28, when Jacob is on the run from his brother Esau, fearing for his life, the Lord comes to him in a dream and assures Jacob that he will be protected. The Lord will provide for him and his descendants. That He has already made the plans for Jacob and his family and will guide him to that future. In verse 15, God says to Jacob in that dream, “I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.”

Later, as God guided the Israelites – Jacob's descendants – out of slavery in Egypt and into Canaan, He did not leave them to find their own way. He gave them a pillar of clouds to follow in the day and a pillar of fire to follow when it was dark. He provided for their every need with fresh water and quail and manna. He placed Moses and Aaron and then Joshua in positions to lead them. He gave them rules to follow so that they could live as He wanted for them to live. But like so many of us, they often grew impatient and tired and came to think they knew better than God. They repeatedly said they'd rather go back into slavery in Egypt than continue on in God's guidance to the freedom of the promised land. For this, they were lost for years, wandering the dessert. When they tried to do as they pleased and refused to allow God to guide them, the way became more difficult. Like me, driving that car with no power steering – missing something and not even knowing it.

So now, for the Power – The definition of power is “great or marked ability to do or act; strength; might; force” or “to give power to; to make powerful; to inspire; spur; sustain.”

Who of us has power? I can do some things. I'd even venture to say I am good at a few things. And I am sure you are, too. But would you use the words might, strength or force to describe your abilities? I am sure all of us in this room have made something well. Maybe you can paint a picture, plant a garden, prepare a wonderful meal... But who of us could even imagine creating the world? Who could design the perfection of this earth? I am in awe of His creation every day.

The Bible contains more references to God's power than I can count. He has saved His people from slavery and felled walls of great cities, but His power is not always in the big things. Sometimes it is in the small, everyday moments of our lives that His real power is revealed. How many times has He been there as a comfort when you were sad? How many times has He been there rejoicing with you? Everything in your life and my life and the lives of everyone on this earth matters to the Lord. He is capable of more love and compassion than you or I could fathom. He was even strong enough to send His only son to suffer and die. Who of us could do that? Not me.

Every spring, when my rosebushes bloom, I think of a poem I read in a church bulletin years ago. I was unable to find out who wrote it, but I'd like to share it with you:

It is only a tiny rosebud,
a flower of God's design;
But I cannot unfold the petals
With these clumsy hands of mine.

The secret of unfolding flowers
Is not known to such as I.
God opens this flower so sweetly,
When in my hands they fade and die.

If I cannot unfold a rosebud,
This flower of God's design,
Then how can I think I have wisdom
To unfold this life of mine?

So I'll trust in Him for His leading
Each moment of every day.
I will look to Him for His guidance
Each step of the pilgrim way.

The pathway that lies before me,
Only my Heavenly Father knows.
I'll trust in Him to unfold the moments,
Just as He unfolds the rose.

I can't put into words how much this effects me. There have been so many times in my life when I thought I was in control. That I could handle anything this life could throw at me. But, of course, I was wrong. No matter how hard I pull on that steering wheel, it will never be enough. Only God's hand is powerful enough to steady the wheel and keep my life on His path.

Finally, I want to close with just this one verse: Jeremiah 10:6 says. “No one is like you, O LORD; you are great, and your name is mighty in power.”

Life Story

2010-04-15T16:39:00.000-04:00

I’ve always loved hearing the stories of other people’s lives. In fact, when I was in elementary school, each time I went to the school library, I sought out the biographies and joke books. The joke books are not relevant to this story, but I love that memory. I had a pretty tight relationship with the librarian (I still resent the fact that she had the nerve to have a baby and miss my 6^th grade year). She would always point me in the direction of a new joke book or a biography that she thought I’d enjoy. Even now, as an adult, one of my favorite television shows is “Biography.”

Recently my husband and I were visiting his parents in the small town where he was raised. He lived there until college and for a short time after college. His parents have been there their entire lives. In fact, they’ve lived in the exact same house the entire 61 years of their marriage. To say that my husband has roots there would be an understatement. He loves the place of his birth and childhood in a way that I probably won’t ever completely understand. I’ve lived in Chattanooga my entire life. In fact, I’ve lived within a ten mile radius of a particular area of town my entire life. My parents still live in the house where I spent the majority of my time with them. I was about 5 years old when they moved there. There’s something different though about a small town. My husband was very closely acquainted with the mailman and the school bus driver. Some of his family members lived literally within walking distance of his house. The insurance man actually comes to the house to collect the insurance payment.

During this recent visit, my husband, father-in-law and I walked through a couple of local cemeteries that are just up the road from where my mother and father-in-law live. It seems a bit morbid, but for the same reason that I love biographies, I enjoy a stroll through a cemetery. It is fascinating to me to think about all the people that have lived their lives, however long or short, and have gone from this life. I love to ponder over the details of their lives. Were they happy? Did they have a good marriage? How many children did they have? What type of job did they have? Where did they live? How did they die? Was it sudden and tragic or was it a long time of suffering? And, more importantly, did they know God? Did they experience His love and grace? Were they obedient to Him?

Both my husband and father-in-law knew many of the people buried in these cemeteries. There are many family members there including my husband’s grandparents, his sister who was stillborn just a little over a year before he was born, and a few aunts, uncles, and cousins. I got a pretty good education about the family and the town from my father-in-law. It was so interesting to me to hear him speak about these people that were once a part of his life and my husband’s.

These are the people that helped to shape my husband into the kind and compassionate man that I married. That makes them even more interesting to me. I love knowing more about them because he and I are developing roots together. Everything about him and his life before we met is now part of my life and vice versa. All the experiences that we both have had have made us the man and woman, husband and wife that we are today. They are a chapter in the stories of our lives.

One day when we pass from this life, there may be someone that strolls by our burial place and wonders about the details of our lives. Those that know us will hopefully know that we were happy and we did have a good marriage. Mostly though I hope they can say that we really did love God and were obedient to Him.

What is the story of your life?

       Now all has been heard;
       here is the conclusion of the matter:
       Fear God and keep his commandments,
       for this is the whole duty of man.

Ecclesiastes 12:13(NIV)

An Exercise in Faith

2010-04-05T21:45:00.000-04:00

Well, it’s my fault. I put it out there and now I should not be surprised that I am getting questions about it. People want to be happy for me. They expect to hear about results and so they ask. Do you want to know how the gym is working for me too? Here goes, since beginning the Juggling Act in January I have been to the gym 4x per week (except for going out-of-town once). Each session lasts approximately two hours. I get 2-4 miles of cardio each time plus three times a week I do circuit training. I’ve been working, sweating, stinking, and cramming this exercise time into my already busy schedule.

Now you want to know my schedule? For starters, I home school two children. This year our subjects include but aren’t limited to composer and orchestral study, art appreciation, poetry, ancient Greece, Bible, supplemental History, cooking, science, Spanish, spelling, sewing, literature, math, reading, and grammar. By the way, I put my own curriculum together. In addition to those responsibilities I am primary laundress, cook, nutritionist, school secretary, counselor, gardener, janitor, event planner, and once a year I’m even the Easter Bunny. Please, don’t tell my kids, they don’t know yet.

Have you noticed that I have still managed to evade the information you seek? According to the scale I have lost no weight...nothing. I have noticed no redistribution. I still have to hold my breath when I zip that freshly washed pair of jeans. But, I do have some good news to report. Firstly, that run-over-by-a-truck feeling that I used to feel the next morning has gone. Secondly, I’ve finally arranged the schedule to better accommodate this lifestyle and now I’m not as stressed as I was. Thirdly, I found the sauna. Lastly, I no longer feel nauseated by the exertion of dips and pull ups. As you can see, I’ve found many blessings to count even if I haven’t noticed the typical weight loss that one expects when exercising faithfully.

I could feel discouraged by not seeing results, but discouragement is not profitable. Since I’m under contract for the next year I’ll go four times per week as much as I’m in town regardless. It doesn’t matter that I’m tired, busy, or that my body isn’t morphing into what it was at age seventeen. You see, I’ve made up my mind. Simply doing what I’ve set out to do gives me the opportunity to exercise spirit as well as the body. It’s called Faithfulness. Faith is not synonymous with belief. It’s not enough to believe that I ought to get exercise four times a week. In order to be faithful I must actually do the exercise. Belief happens in the mind. Faith mostly happens in the body. Faith is a belief that motivates us to action. Faith always causes change. In my personal Bible I have underlined every place in the great chapter of faith where there is an action that was caused by faith. If you are trying to teach subjects and verbs this would be a great chapter to have your student practice on. It’d also be good for math because there’s a bunch of action verbs to count. Frankly, I lost track of them; but, all of the academics that could be learned from Heb. 11 is beside the point. The point is that as Christians we have a rich heritage of faithful people and the things they DID because of that faith.

What are we going to do about it? Heb 12:1 advises we “run with endurance the race that is set before us, laying aside every weight and sin.” The only way we’ll do that is to “look to Jesus…who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross.” What are we willing to endure for the joy that is set before us?

I’m willing to faithfully endure the sweat, extra laundry, loss of time, and loss of money that comes from fully participating in the gym. What is the joy set before me? Why am I doing this? I don’t know. I guess I hope that I’ll be somewhat healthier. I put roughly 10 hours of hard labor each week into a vague expectation from all of this exercising. Yet, our true joy as described in the Bible is not vague. It is certain and WONDERFUL. How much more ought I invest in godliness which is not only profitable in this lifetime, but in the next (1 Tim 4:8).

What I Like Best About Our Home School

2010-04-03T02:45:00.000-04:00

Morning Bible time
Hearing “Good job Sissy”
Waking up naturally
Hearing young voices sing praises at will any time of the day
Having God included in our subjects
Learning, laughing, working, struggling, and overcoming - all together
Reciting memory verses together
Being able to distribute hugs as necessary
Being able to discipline as necessary
Knowing the heart of my children and their true character
Watching the spontaneous dances that can’t be helped when listening to
composer study and sometimes joining in - shhhhh
Breakfasts like this:

What do you love about homeschooling?

Christian Diseases (Part 1)

2010-03-30T16:32:00.000-04:00

Over my spiritual life, I’ve encountered many spiritual sicknesses. From time-to-time, I fall ill and need a massive dose of spiritual vitamins! The great news is that there’s always a remedy. I thought I’d share what I’ve learned (many times the hard way). I’m certainly no "doctor", but I think I can offer some insight on the matter. After all, I’ve suffered from them all at some point in my life! (I wrote this originally for Vertical magazine.)

Slow Poke Virus

Symptoms: She says she’ll do something, then doesn’t do it. She waits until the last minute to do projects and does a half-hearted job.

Results: Very unreliable, frustrates those around her, ministry work may fail or be less effective because of negligence

Treatment:

Set mini goals so that tasks don’t seem so overwhelming
Have an accountability partner...someone who can text you reminders or encourage you to stay on task
Prioritize your weekly activities...sometimes Peter has too many things going on

"No matter what you do, work at it with all your might..." Ecclesiastes 9:10

Party-Pooper Disease

Symptoms: This Christian never supports events outside of worship . She’s the first to leave after Sunday service.

Results: Lack of connection with the body of believers, offends event planners of church functions, often “never knows what’s going on”

Treatment:

Leave your comfort zone by having a conversation with someone you don’t normally speak to
Decide immediately to enthusiastically participate in the next fellowship event

"Let us not give up meeting together. Some are in the habit of doing this. Instead, let us cheer each other up with words of hope. Let us do it all the more as you see the day coming when Christ will return." Hebrews 10:25

Pessimistic-itis

Symptoms: She can find the worse attributes about anything! She usually criticizes all new ideas.

Results: Easily hurts the feelings of others, loss of respect from many young Christians, sets bad example for non-believers, many conversations end when they speak

Treatment:

Avoid giving your opinion until you’ve thought through an appropriate response
Make lists of things you’re thankful for
Practice giving compliments

"Warn anyone who tries to get believers to take sides and separate into their own little groups." Titus 3:10

"Do all things without complaining and disputing." Philippians 2:14

(stay tuned for part 2)

You Go Girl!

2010-03-21T21:52:00.000-04:00

I am the leader of a particular ministry at my church. It is a children’s ministry that involves children that live in the community surrounding our church. Most of these kids are disadvantaged in many ways. They are from broken homes, their parents are or have been in jail, drugs and alcohol are part of their daily lives. I was “appointed” to the role of leader somewhat by default. I started out as the only teacher of a few children. The ministry grew to the point of needing multiple teachers for about twenty children. I suppose since I had a history with the kids I was chosen to be the leader.

I am generally a much better follower than leader. I don’t feel that I possess any leadership skills. I prefer to be behind the scenes doing my work in the background. Nevertheless I find myself in this role so I’ve prayed for the skills and the desire to do this to the best of my ability. I fall far short of that most of the time, but I keep trying. Thankfully I have a wonderful team of co-workers supporting me and the ministry.

Recently I sent an e-mail to my co-workers regarding some issues with our ministry. Nothing too serious. We’ve just had some timing problems and behavior problems (with the kids not the teachers). We tend to slack sometimes in paying attention to the clock and enforcing the rules.

My parents began to help with this ministry about a year or so ago. I am thankful for them and was never the teenager that was embarrassed by their parents. I always wanted them around and they always have been. My mom’s response to the e-mail was simply, “You go girl.” I’m not exactly sure why she was cheering me on, but it made me smile. First of all, my mother just saying that makes me smile. My mother sending me an e-mail from “Comcast mobile” makes me smile. She’s more technologically advanced than I. Mostly though, it makes me smile to know that she was pleased by something I did.

What is it about getting approval from your parents? No matter how old I am it pleases me to know that my parents are proud of the person I have become. I want them to be proud of me. I never want to disappoint them. I want people to look at me and say, “J.L. and Charlene sure did a good job with their kids.” Hopefully that is the case, although I’m sure there are times when people look at me and say, “What in the world were J.L. and Charlene thinking?” See, in some ways, I am a reflection of my parents. I don’t want to embarrass them. I want to be a good representation of them so that others will think highly of them.

In the same way I am a reflection of the love of Christ. I want people to look at me and see my Dad because I think he’s pretty cool. He’s patient and kind and compassionate. More importantly though, I want people to look at me and see my Heavenly Father. He is loving and merciful and forgiving. Certainly I possess some physical and character traits of my biological parents. Hopefully I posses some character traits of my Heavenly Father as well. I want to look like Him. I want to act like Him. I want people to see love, mercy and forgiveness in me and in turn I want those traits to point to the One who gave them to me.

I strive to be a reflection of the love and grace of Jesus Christ.

If I keep that as my goal, one day when I finally meet my Father face to face, He will look at me with love and say, “You go girl.”

Surprise (Part 2)

2010-03-09T17:59:00.000-05:00

Well, I think he really liked the surprise. He was happy about it and thankful for it. His wariness turned to excitement once he found where we were going, what we were doing, and who we would see.

I guess you’re wondering what the big surprise was. It was something meaningful only to him. We went to Nashville. A place we enjoy visiting, but would not want to live. Talk about traffic. Anyway, the plan was to see an icon of bluegrass music at the Grand Ole Opry. He loves bluegrass music. Well, the icon, Ralph Stanley, for some reason didn’t make it to the Opry. As fate would have it, there was another bluegrass group. Their name escapes me at the moment, but it really doesn’t matter. They played one song, “Rocky Top.” My husband is a Georgia Bulldogs fan. You can imagine that “Rocky Top” isn’t really one of his favorite songs. So not only is one of his favorite artists a no show, but he also has to listen to one of his least favorite songs. Happy Anniversary, Honey. Oh well. We had a good time there, despite the fact that this part of the surprise didn’t pan out quite like I thought it would.

The real surprise though was a visit with some of his college friends. When I started planning this I first thought that might be an odd way to spend an anniversary. I mean, shouldn’t we have a romantic evening alone??? Since we basically spend all of our nights alone (although we have no children, don’t assume that every evening is a romantic date), I decided that we could share this anniversary with friends. After all, he shared a few years of his life with these guys during college and we shared our wedding day with them since they were part of our wedding ceremony. It seemed appropriate that we would include them in our celebration.

I had hoped that we could meet the guys and their wives and children at a local restaurant. They had a much better idea. We were invited to have dinner at one friend’s home. After driving in circles for a few minutes we finally arrived at their house and were greeted with gifts, flowers and a terrific steak dinner. While the food and gifts were great, the best part of the evening was the fellowship. The guys talked of their college days and laughed about things almost forgotten. A word or a name would bring back a memory that would launch another story. I love hearing these stories because I didn’t go to college with my husband. I love hearing him speak about that time in his life because it gives me a new perspective. It lets me experience those days with him. I love it because it’s a time in his life that was special to him. That makes it special to me. These people are special to him. That makes them special to me.

I worked pretty hard on the details of this plan. I made sure I had all my ducks in a row. I executed my plan as well as possible. Unfortunately it didn’t go exactly as I had anticipated. Isn’t life like that too? We plan, we schedule, and we prepare. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn’t. But, in all things, if we are following God’s plan, it will always work out for the best.

My anniversary surprise certainly worked out for the best. We got to spend some quality time together without the distractions of our “normal” life and we go to spend some quality time with friends that we don’t often get to see.

It turned out to be a perfect weekend!

Tears

2010-03-07T18:08:00.001-05:00

The first, nearly ten years ago, had a heart defect.

The second, less than a year ago, suffered an accidental overdose.

The third, the one to whom I was closest and who was, in fact, a distant cousin, succumbed to complications from cancer just before Thanksgiving, leaving two small children.

Lastly, in the wee hours of this morning, a car carrying my childhood friend and four others went off a bridge and into a creek. Four escaped the car and survived. My friend did not.

These four women were all of my high school graduating class and, at just 31 myself, I sometimes have difficulty with the fact that they are no longer with us less than 14 years since that graduation. How is it that ones so young are already gone?

But I am reminded that we are all in the same fragile state. None of us has the promise of tomorrow. Though sad at this loss, I am also grateful. I am grateful for the memories I have of each of these ladies when we were all carefree girls. Most of all, though, I am grateful for God's amazing gift of eternal life through His Son. I can know that no matter how long my life may last, even if I don't see tomorrow, I have a glorious eternity with God in Heaven coming and when I'm there, the tears will all be wiped away.

Surprise (Part 1)

2010-03-03T10:23:00.002-05:00

On March 6th my husband and I will be celebrating six years of marriage. Part of me can’t believe that six years have passed. But, another part of me feels like we’ve been married forever. I mean that in a good way. We’ve reached that place in our marriage where we are totally comfortable with one another. Not so comfortable so as to be complacent. Comfortable enough to feel safe, protected, loved and content.

For the past five years we’ve celebrated our anniversary by having dinner at a special place. We always go to a place we’ve never been. Sometimes this has taken us on day or even weekend trips out of town. Other times we’ve discovered new or different things right here at home. Last year we were blessed to spend the day with his entire family. We share his parents’ anniversary so we celebrated their 60th and our 5th anniversary together with his family in a beautiful North GA mountain setting.

This year though, we’re doing something different. I’m planning a huge surprise for him. Really there are two surprises. One on Friday. Another on Saturday. Oh, it’s not really anything all that grand. It’s something that we’ve wanted to do, but haven’t made time to do (honey, if you’re reading this, that’s a great clue). It’s something that will be lots of fun. It’s something that he will enjoy. Precious memories will be made. It’s a huge surprise because it’s something that I know will be meaningful to him.

I am so excited about it that I just can’t stand it. I’m dying to tell him. I can’t wait to see the excitement in his eyes, the smile on his face. But, I’m also enjoying watching him trying to figure it out. He’s asked questions, speculated on the destination and even threatened not to go (not seriously of course). See, he’s a bit leery of surprises. He’s just a little afraid of the unknown.

So am I. How about you? Do you like surprises?

I think we would all agree that there are great surprises and there are some not so great surprises. The surprise party we gave my dad last year for his 65th birthday was fun. The anticipation of this surprise anniversary trip is exciting. However, the surprise speeding ticket I got on the way home from our family Thanksgiving celebration a couple of years ago was not great. The recent surprise purchase of an entire set of new tires for a relatively new vehicle was not fun.

I have a dear friend and mentor who says she loves walking with the Lord because He’s always surprising her. She loves the fact that she doesn’t always know what’s around the corner. She loves the way God reveals His plan for her life one step at a time. That’s really hard for me. I’m a planner. Sometimes to the point of being obsessive. I create lists and spreadsheets for almost every aspect of my life. My family loves to make fun of me for this. Of course, they aren’t laughing on Sunday afternoon when we KNOW where we’re eating lunch because I’ve got a spreadsheet for our weekly family lunch. I really do.

Anyway, sometimes it’s frightening to anticipate the unknown. It can be exciting and scary at the same time. Even though life is full of surprises, both good and bad, it’s comforting to know that God is in control. He’s promised us that if we love Him all things will work together for good (Romans 8:28). He has a plan for our lives. A plan to bless us not harm us (Jeremiah 29:11). If we allow him complete control, like my friend, we can live in a state of excited anticipation knowing that what’s coming is going to be OK.

I wonder if my husband will like his anniversary surprise.

I’ll let you know.

A Beautiful Bride

2010-02-28T16:34:00.000-05:00

Last week I got a save the date postcard in the mail. This wedding will be held very near to my own anniversary which got me thinking. Planning a wedding is a lot of work. There are so many preparations for the bride to make. There’s a lot to think of and every decision is made very carefully. First, there’s THE DRESS, then somewhere along the way the bride chooses her hairstyle, nails, makeup, undergarments, jewelry, and THE SHOES. So far all the effort I’ve mentioned is only on her adornment. Doesn’t every bride want to be beautiful to her husband?

Then I got to thinking of the church as the bride of Christ, and me as a member of that church. How am I preparing for the wedding day? How am I adorning myself? God’s word* says that for a woman to adorn herself with a gentle and quiet spirit and good works is precious in His eyes. Okay, WOW. I'm just going to let this sink in.

I’ve also been thinking a lot lately of what it will be like when I finally meet God face to face. I know that I am not even worthy to cower at His feet, but thanks to the blood of Jesus I believe that I will someday stand before Him unashamed and guiltless. Like an engaged woman, I sometimes get butterflies in my tummy. Not from fear; rather, from excitement.

Sometimes I am baffled that He CHOSE me, but I am so grateful that He did. I will do whatever I can to prepare myself to be beautiful to Him. This will take effort, but won’t it be worth it? Can you imagine what a reception in the King’s court will be like? I hope to see you there. We can celebrate together.

* I Peter 3:3-4, I Tim 2:9-10

Be Salty

2010-02-24T15:05:00.002-05:00

I was reading to my daughter from The Word & Song Bible the other night when I came across something I had never really thought of before. The story references Matthew 5:13 where Jesus says, "You are the salt of the earth...".

But what does that mean? How am I salt? Quite honestly, I had never considered it before.

This story goes on to say "...real salt always makes people thirsty. And when you're thirsty, you want a drink of water."

If we are the salt, then we are the ones who are supposed to make others thirsty - thirsty for Living Water (John 4:10-11)! We should be "salty" enough that we cause others to want to know about Jesus when they see us. If we lose our saltiness, we can't make people thirsty. We must work every day to reflect Jesus in our words and actions so that people will thirst for Him.

February Financial Fast, Day 23

2010-02-23T15:09:00.003-05:00

We are in the home stretch, with just 5 more days to go. It is kind-of amazing. At the beginning of the month, though I was optimistic, I didn't expect it to go this easily. Of course, there have been a few missteps here and there and I have really missed craft stores and school supply stores and even the grocery store. But along the way, we've learned that we are capable and resourceful and that we are blessed far beyond our needs. And isn't that the point of all of this? To look at our lives and see just how much God gives us. How many things do I have that I just take for granted every day? The house I'm in, the food in the pantry, the cars in the driveway, the chair where I sit and the computer where I type these words. The TIME together. We didn't go out just for something to do. We played games and talked around the dinner table and I picked up the guitar my father-in-law gave me years ago and actually learned three chords. We watched documentaries and the Olympics and I occasionally went to bed a little earlier – once or twice even before midnight! I can look at this life and see just how blessed I really am. One-tenth of what God has given me is more than I deserve. And then, as if all of that weren't enough, there is salvation and eternal life with Him yet to come which makes everything else look like nothing. What a loving, giving Father we have!

Yield

2010-02-22T15:14:00.002-05:00

When I first thought about the concept of yielding I was thinking about surrendering, submitting or relinquishing. Giving up possession of something or perhaps giving up control of some situation or relationship. I figured that if it’s hard for me to give up my time, talents, money, control, etc. that it’s hard for others as well.

What I found when I started looking deeper at this word is that I like the other definitions of this word much better. I love the idea of yielding as bearing fruit or producing something after cultivation or receiving a return on an investment. That’s a much more positive way to look at this idea of yielding.

And, of course, when I started searching the Bible for the word yield that’s exactly what I found. There are, naturally, tons of references to yielding in relation to actual crops. There are also lots of figurative references to bearing fruit. We all know that the Spirit produces in us the fruit of love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5: 22-23 NKJV).

I love the idea of bearing fruit as described in Psalm 1.

1 Blessed is the man
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
Nor stands in the path of sinners,
Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
2 But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
And in His law he meditates day and night.
3 He shall be like a tree
Planted by the rivers of water,
That brings forth its fruit in its season,
Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever he does shall prosper.
(Psalm 1: 1-3 NKJV)

I love the image of the tree planted by streams of water. I particularly love this Psalm because someone mentioned it in describing my grandmother as she was dying a few years ago. I’ll never forget that comparison. Her roots went deep. Her delight was in the Lord. She cultivated her relationship with God. As a result her life yielded the fruit of faithfulness.

From this Psalm and from thinking about my grandmother’s life, I learned that there is some surrendering, submitting and relinquishing required in bearing fruit or receiving a return on an investment. As the sign above suggests, my original thoughts on yielding were about being required to give up or surrender to something or someone. However, the beautiful thing about God is that He allows us the choice. He never forces us to submit to His will. We’re certainly better off if we do. If we delight in Him, he will give us the desires of our heart (Psalm 37:4).

Just like my grandmother, if we sink deep into the soil of His Word, we will bear the fruit of love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Others will notice that fruit and know that we love Him and will want a relationship with Him as well.

And, isn’t it our ultimate goal to yield fruit through sharing our faith?

Singing Hallelujah!

2010-02-20T18:12:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, my family was invited to have a family devotional with friends from church. Roberto, our gracious (and comical) host explained how he and his wife Jeana used to have group singing every week through college and how inspiring those moments were to their spiritual encouragement.

As with most of us, life gets busy and it’s so easy to let go of simple, important pleasures. They sought to revive their first love of having weekly devotions...and I’m so glad they did! We talked, we laughed, we ate (eating is always good, right?), but most of all, we sang our hearts out!

It’s beautiful to listen to the medley of voices…what a sweet aroma it must be to God. We all sing in worship service, but singing along freely and earnestly with friends at home just does something to you!

We took turns choosing songs…each person picking nostalgic hymns from childhood or suggesting favorite harmonious selections. Not only did I learn a lot of new songs, but I got excellent song practice as well. Everyone sang out, even looking up occasionally as if to tell God, "I love you so much for what you are doing in my life."

Ephesians 5:19 tells us to "Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs..." Now that’s a great way to encourage one another! As we ended our evening, we locked arms and sang "Bind Us Together" and prayed for the families that were represented in our gathering. Simply put, it was a great way to end the week. I think we’ll host it next time.

February Financial Fast, Day 15

2010-02-15T17:31:00.001-05:00

Well, we've passed the half-way point and so far, it is looking pretty good. I am almost ashamed to say that the pantry and freezer have barely seen a dent in their stockpiles. The refrigerator, on the other hand, is getting pretty bare. The milk is gone, much to my daughter's dismay, but we have a dozen eggs and there are still 3 – 4 bottles of juice as well as cheese and plenty of baby carrots, apples and oranges.

However, the great benefit of all of this has not been the grocery expenses. It has been all the other little things. A cup of coffee here, drive-thru there, a candy bar for the kid, more yarn (I admit, I am a bit of an addict), more clothes, movie rentals that end up being kept until there are late charges, just SO MUCH STUFF. And for what? What were these things adding to our lives? I am not saying that we will continue to be this strict after this experiment is over, but I can already see the changes both in my and my husband's thinking and in out daughter's. We're reading more, cooking at home more, playing (borrowed) video games together. It is definitely so much of an awakening that already I have to recommend that you and your family try this when you can.

One admission I do have to make, however, is one slip-up. One day last week, I had a migraine and my husband was sick. He drove our daughter to his parents' house for the night and, on the way back, picked up fast food so neither of us would have to cook dinner and could just eat and then go to bed early. At the time, I was terribly thankful for the exception, but now I feel the guilt of it. That was $10 gone to feed two people a single meal. So, no, we are not perfect in this endeavor – not that I expected to be – but I think, over all, we are doing quite well. Here's to 13 more days of recognizing our true blessings and coming to a better understanding of needs vs. wants!

Background Noise

2010-02-08T19:27:00.000-05:00

My husband and I are both pretty quiet people. We like quiet. At times we even crave quiet. It seems as if every time we go into a restaurant we will inevitably be seated next to the loudest person, couple or family there. Most of the time we just laugh about it and laugh at ourselves a little bit for being somewhat “intolerant” of the noise around us. Other times we get a bit frustrated about it. It’s hard to focus on having a conversation with each other when you are trying to tune out the background noise.

We all struggle with background noise at times don’t we? The unwanted meaningless sound coming from behind us that interferes with where our attention should be. It catches our attention, but distracts us from our purpose. It confuses us so we don’t know where to turn. We hear the wrong things. We don’t hear what we need to hear. We can’t concentrate. We are sometimes even distracted to the point of actually turning to see what’s going on behind us.

In life, background noise can come in the form of stress, worry, work, family, illness, media, etc. Not necessarily all bad things, but certainly things that may distract us from our true purpose. I find that sometimes the noise is so loud that I can’t hear the voice of God. I get so distracted by the busyness of life that I take my eyes off Him and lose His voice. How can we hear the voice of God in the midst of all the noise in our lives?

We hear from God by reading His Word. However, it’s not enough to read the Word without paying attention to it. In Hebrews 2:1 the writer says, “For this reason we must pay closer attention to what we have heard lest we drift away from it.” Sometimes that background noise is really attractive to us. When we are hearing what we want to hear we may not be listening to what we NEED to hear. It’s so important to be focused on the right voices. I participate in a Pilates class every week. If you are not familiar with Pilates it is very similar to yoga. The goal of Pilates is to strengthen the core muscles through a series of stretching exercises along with deep breathing. If you’ve ever done either, you know how much you have to focus on both the movements and the breathing. In my Pilates class we end each session with some balance postures. Have you ever tried to balance on one foot? It’s not as easy as it looks. My instructor always advises us to stare straight ahead and find a focal point. Guess what happens the minute you take your eyes off that point? You begin to lose your balance and may even fall. This reminds me of what happened to Peter in Matthew 14:22-33. Peter had enough faith to step out of the boat into the water. He was focused on getting to Jesus. But, he was distracted by the waves and the wind around him. As soon as he took his focus off of Jesus he began to sink.

It’s the same for us. As long as we keep our eyes on Jesus the distractions and background noise of the world will fade and his voice will become clear. Only then can we truly hear what we need to hear.

What are you focusing on today?

February Financial Fast, Day 6

2010-02-06T13:40:00.001-05:00

So, the "February Financial Fast" has been in full swing for 6 days now. How's it going? Not bad, really.

I did buy one thing: an umbrella. Mine was stepped on and broken and the rain just has not stopped around here lately. I tried to think of a way around it (besides, you know, just getting wet), but sadly, I do not own a poncho and none of my coats are waterproof.

Other than that, there's been nothing. Our pantry and freezer remain full and the only thing I have really missed was being able to grab something to eat while out running errands the other day. Because of a doctor's appointment, I had skipped breakfast and by the time I got out of there, picked up my daughter, and gone to the pharmacy, it was 3 in the afternoon and I was regretting not having planned ahead. So, lesson learned. When I went out yesterday, I packed a lunch!

The photos below are of our two main pantry spaces on January 31st. Because of my couponing and stocking up since October, there isn't much change yet, but I will post more as the month progresses.

Anxiety

2010-02-06T13:17:00.000-05:00

The other night, after about two hours of sleep, I awoke with a nagging, uncomfortable dread that I have come to know all too well. Since the age of 20, I have suffered from the occasional panic attack. In the beginning, they were mild and infrequent, but as time went on they became a common occurrence and yet each seemed, to me, more scary than the last. I visited the Emergency Room three times over as many years, convinced each time that I was having a heart attack. EKGs and chest x-rays revealed nothing despite searing pain in my chest and shortness of breath. By the time I reached 30, having several attacks a week was not uncommon. It is almost as if there are two voices in my head during these times. One insisting, "Everything is fine, we've been through this before, just breathe." and the other screaming, "WE ARE DYING!!!". AT times, these attacks became so debilitating that I didn't want to get out of bed. I have prayed over this so much over the years. I could not wrap my mind around the fact that I believed in and trusted God who allows me to give Him all of my worries and cares and yet, I was not ABLE to give Him this. I know that worry and stress are useless (Luke 12:25), so why did this consume me? Why, with all of the things that I gave to Him during the day, could I not also give Him this anxiety that seemed to have no real cause?

After some time, I found that my dad and his mother have also dealt with these same symptoms for most of their lives. While it helped to see this as a genetic problem, it still brought me no closer to understanding.

Late last year, I began seeing a new doctor. The same one who treats my dad. He prescribed medication that has decreased the frequency of the attacks, though, as tonight is evidence, it has not stopped them completely. This medication also brought with it another problem. I became concerned that I was leaning on medication when I should have been leaning on my Lord. No matter how much I prayed over this, I could not figure out what this meant for my life.

Thankfully, my dear Kenya helped me to put things in perspective. Obviously, if I had a broken arm I would see a doctor to repair and set it. While I would certainly pray that God would help me to heal, no one I know would think it wrong to seek medical attention in this situation. The difference, I think, comes with the stigma of mental disorders.

Having spent so much of my life working with foster children, I am no stranger to the varied and terrible effect the mind can have on the rest of the body and I can attest that we, as a society, tend to be afraid of anything we do not understand and we are FAR from understanding the diseases of the mind.

But God isn't. He knows everything there is to know and He certainly knows that my anxiety disorder is no sign of my lack of faith in and dependence on Him. He gave man the knowledge and ability to create medical treatments. In 1 Timothy 5:23 (NIV), Paul encourages the young Timothy to "take a little wine because of your stomach and frequent illnesses". In their time, water was certainly anything but pure and water-borne illness was rampant. It is not to be missed that Paul was sure to include the word "little" here; he was absolutely not advocating that Timothy depend solely on the wine. Is that so different from my medication? If this helps me to focus myself, sleep better, be a better wife and mother and, in the end, be able to live my life the way God would want me to. As with Timothy, it cannot become my crutch or addiction, but it can be a tool that God has provided me so that I can better live for Him.

Learning to Shut Up

2010-02-06T12:29:00.000-05:00

Ok, it’s no secret that I have a big mouth. I love to talk! I’ve often thought of it as a gift at times, thinking of how it has allowed me to make new friends, avoid awkward moments, or even speak publicly occasionally without throwing up (I do feel that way sometimes)!

But we all know there’s another side, a dark side, to this "talent". Many times, I fail miserably of just knowing when to be quiet! This is especially true when it comes to Bible discussion (or maybe a better word is DEBATE).

I had a spiritual revelation this week. Nothing new. Not some scripture I’d never read before (as a matter of fact, this scripture was highlighted and underlined). Often times, seasoned Christians can (and should) be pricked by familiar scriptures in a new way. It’s more of a matter of spiritual maturity than it is of scriptural memorization.

In Bible class, we’re studying 2 Timothy 2 and all of the advice that Paul (whom I considered the boldest apostle) is giving to his younger Christian brother, Timothy. He’s reminding him to tell the other Christians to avoid "quarreling about words" (v. 14 NIV). The verse goes on to say that it is of no value and hurtful to those who are witnessing it. Wow. That was powerful to me this week. Me, a zealous Christian, who’s usually ready for the "throw down" any time concerning doctrinal matters and any other discussion in between!

It’s a great point to ponder. Here’s the (arguably) most-passionate apostle who’s kept his spiritual fire for the Lord through several near-death experiences telling his son in the gospel to be gentle and pursue peace rather than give way to stupid arguments. (Yep, the NIV Bible says "stupid") He went on to say that they (the arguments) are pointless.

The heart of the matter is that when we argue about the Bible or any of its principles, we’ve taken God out of it and replaced spiritual truth with personal pride (you know, basically just "getting somebody told"). And that turns it all into "Godless chatter".

Now, none of this means we can’t have Bible discussion. We need that. God expects that. It’s just having the self-control to know when the discussion is fruitful and when it’s not. For instance, arguing with your colleague about how wrong he or she is to have instrumental music during the worship service, usually just leads you to losing a friend...not bringing someone to spiritual enlightenment. Wouldn’t it be easier to just study the Bible together without pointing fingers and calling names?

There’s lots of wisdom in Paul’s letter. He’s near his death in Rome and, as you can see, he’s wiser about a few things concerning the matters of Biblical discussion and exhortation. I think spiritual maturity brings you closer to the goal of knowing that the best persuader for Christ is living your Christianity out loud..not yelling about it!

I feel as though this newest growing pain has helped me to rise above my spiritually-adolescent thinking. Praise God for spiritual growth...

A Juggling Act

2010-02-01T11:51:00.000-05:00

I’ve never learned how to juggle balls, but as a wife and mother who teaches her children at home, I’ve learned over the years how to juggle responsibilities. By the grace of God through my status as full-time homemaker, I’ve learned something of the arts of cooking, baking, nursing, and teaching. For years I’ve been trying to perfect these and the other arts necessary to manage a home successfully. I will admit that there was a time when I thought of these tasks as menial. But, now that I have these responsibilities, I know how much skill it takes. It’s just plain tough.

The other day I decided to do something that would throw a wrench into this perpetual juggling act. I signed up for a gym membership. Admittedly, I should have prayed over this decision a bit more, but before I knew it I’d signed my life away. Okay, not my life, but a substantial monthly fee. Now, to justify the expense, I find myself exercising four times a week. All this exercise gobbles up a lot of valuable time, so now I feel more stress than ever and I’m constantly fatigued. Ironic, isn’t it? I thought that exercise was supposed to give you more energy and take away stress? For me, it’s just not panning out that way. So what have I learned from this?

1) Exercise is good for the body, but God renews the soul. He alone brings life.

2) That where I am deficient God is abundant. Um, I’m not that smart. Or organized. So who’s going to get credit for raising children who are intelligent, productive, God-honoring citizens? God will receive all the glory and only I will know how far short I fall and how little credit I deserve.

3) All I have to do is obey. What a relief. I do not control the outcome. I only control the degree of my submission.

Verses for consideration: Timothy 4:8, Isaiah 40:29, Galatians 6:9, Lamentations 3:22-24

What I Learned, or Re-Learned, This Week

2010-02-01T11:43:00.000-05:00

1. Chocolate-chip bagels and Cafe Mochas are awesome, but a little one-on-one with your friend at the coffee house is even better.

2. Never trust weather forecasters.

3. There are no snow-days for homeschoolers.

Willful Sins

2010-01-30T17:11:00.000-05:00

Keep your servant also from willful sins;
may they not rule over me.
Then will I be blameless,
innocent of great transgression.
Psalm 19:13

Recently as I was reading Psalm 19 the phrase “willful sins” in verse 13 caught my eye. Actually it stopped me in my tracks. Willful sins. Deliberate sins. Intentional sins.

I wonder how many times I have willfully sinned this week. This month? This year? How many times, like a defiant child stares into the face of her father and says, "I don’t want to share my toys today," have I looked into the face of my Savior and said, "I don’t want to be nice to my neighbor today?" How many times have I said, "No, God. I’m going to do things my way this time. I know it’s wrong but I’m going to do it anyway?" How many times have I stomped my feet and said, "No. Not today. Not this time. Being forgiving just isn’t working for me today?"

Sadly I’ve had moments like this in my life. Haven’t you? Hopefully, though, as I am changed by His Word and His Spirit, those moments will come less frequently. Through prayer and study of His Word, I am changed and my willful attitude can become a willing and obedient heart.

Thankfully I have a Father who understands my weakness and provides the strength I need in order to be obedient to Him. Just like the father that lovingly disciplines his defiant daughter and forgives her, God lovingly forgives me and brings me back to His will and continues to transform me into the obedient child he wants me to be.

Are you willful or willing?

February Financial Fast

2010-01-27T12:23:00.000-05:00

In conversation a few nights ago, my dear Yvonne mentioned she had a friend who, last year, took the month of February and did not spend anything. When I talked to my husband about it later that night, he loved the idea, and it looks like we may give it a go. We're still hammering out the ground rules, but here is what we have so far:

1. Shopping for groceries or anything else, in the stores or online is completely out. Our pantry and freezer are full to bursting and we really don't NEED anything right now.

2. No dining out, getting take out, or grabbing a soda when getting gas. No movie rentals. No gifts unless they are homemade from what we already have.

3. Necessary school supplies and field trips for our daughter are exempt.

4. Standard bills and gas in the cars are exempt but driving should be kept to a minimum.

5. Church contribution is, of course, exempt.

6. Previously scheduled medical and dental visits as well as any prescription medications are exempt.

So, that's it. We'll have one last grocery trip on the 31st to get milk and bread, but then we're done. We are doing this prayerfully and with the purpose of being better stewards of our blessings. I hope to learn a lot from it and I hope to share along the way so that you may learn, too.

A Luckless Life

2010-01-25T16:20:00.000-05:00

Recently, I've been trying to remove the word “luck” from my vocabulary. I am not “lucky” – I am BLESSED. The events in my life are not random happenstance, but are loving gifts of my heavenly Father and all he does to guide, guard and care for me.

Upon closer inspection, the seemingly innocuous concept of luck is a very non-Christian way of viewing the events in our lives. Ancient Romans worshiped luck in the form of the goddess Fortuna (and the Greeks had Tyche) from which we now get our word for fortune or fortunate. Luck can be good or bad and puts us at the mercy of an unknown force acting upon us in a way that is both inconsiderate of our lives and inconsequential of anything we may or may not do.

Blessings, however, are a very different concept from that of luck. God is the supreme ruler of this world and has all things in His control. One of my very favorite Bible verses is Romans 8:28 (TNIV) “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” and later, in verse 31, “...If God is for us, who can be against us?”. How then are we to believe that anything happens to us randomly? Even what may not seem a blessing now, may be one later when time and retrospect allow you to see your growth as a Christian. God has a plan for us and compels us by the events in our lives to be His children and follow the path He has laid out for us.

If God in Heaven is my Father, then I am His daughter. Who among us would allow randomness to lead our children? Who would set their child on a path that leads to nowhere? So much more so is our Lord. (Matthew 7:9 - 11) He is the God of everything and He makes every day a blessing for me.

Someone's Watching Me

2010-01-25T13:48:00.000-05:00

It's not that I didn't realize others mattered on my race to heaven, it's just that usually I'm so focused on how I'm going to get there that I forget that Christianity is a team sport.

Now don't get me wrong, we all have to do our part (I guess it's more like a relay race...Philippians 2:12-16), but God is pleased to see his children working and growing together.

I recently received two very encouraging notes from two younger sisters in Christ. They weren't long profound letters or phone calls, but the impact was enormous! One came in the form of a text message. It simply said, "Hey Kenya! I wanted to send you a few words and let you know that I love you and appreciate your example as a Christian woman!"

"Wow, where did that compliment come from? What did I do?" I thought. I thanked God for her that moment...she had truly made my day. The second sweet encouragement came in the form of a Facebook status (maybe you didn't realize how encouraging Facebook can be). My sister simply mentioned several ladies in her status that she was blessed to know through their spiritual marriages. (another humbling compliment)

This message isn't really about compliments at all (although they are very nice). This message is more about the fact that your sisters in Christ are watching you.(Unfortunately, this means they notice the good and the bad.) They are noticing the things you say. They are noticing the church events you attend. They are watching the way you interact with your husband and your children. You are someone's big sister and maybe you never even realized it.

What I Learned, or Re-Learned, This Week

2010-01-25T13:36:00.000-05:00

1. Take care of your teeth - dental repairs are painful and expensive.

2. I can make (and am making) this shawl.

3. If you tape a poster to the wall and it falls and you put back and it falls again and this repeats every day for a week, it is no longer the tape's fault. It's yours. Go find the thumbtacks.

4. An evening with the girls can completely rejuvenate.

5. Coupons are great, but sometimes the best way to save money is just to stay home.

Homeschooling with God in the Driver's Seat

2010-01-17T10:37:00.000-05:00

As a mother who teaches her young children at home, the most frequent question I am asked is "What are you gonna do about teaching chemistry?" Admittedly, chemistry is not the only subject that people are concerned about, sometimes it’s also physics, foreign language, calculus, or biology. Homeschooling is now popular enough that most people know a neighbor, distant relative, or someone who teaches their children at home, but they certainly do not understand what goes on inside their home and how these kids are actually learning. The majority of those who want to know how home schooling moms plan to teach high school fall into three categories.

The first of these categories is The Spectator. Those who ask this question about home schooling remember the difficulties of being in real school with professional teachers. They know that it was hard enough to keep up with these subjects as a student. What they are really asking is “How could a regular mom possibly have enough mastery of the material to competently teach the high school subjects?” Commonly, good mothers will admit to each other that trying to help their gifted second grader with homework can be a challenge. It’s impossible to comprehend families who take the entirety of their children's education into their own hands. Indeed, the home schooling family can be an intriguing mystery. For many, home school families provide the same curiosity as sideshow exhibits at the state fair. To these people the question of how to teach an upper level subject is as important as paying their fair ticket and stepping into the tent to find the answer to this strange phenomenon. It’s a wonder. It’s a relief to know. But, when they exit the tent the show is over, their curiosity satisfied, and their life goes on as usual. Truthfully, it didn’t matter if their questions were ever answered because they weren't affected.

Others ask because they are affronted that one might try educating their children outside of the professional teaching industry’s realm. Likely, they are a proud teacher. They’ve spent a lot of money on a college education to earn a degree that has trained them in their occupation as a teacher. They’ve spent so much time and put immense effort into their work. It’s only natural that they will not comprehend how a plain untrained mom with a will could do it. Asking "What are you gonna do about chemistry?" is the polite way of asking, "What makes you think that you can teach your child successfully?" It implies that "Even if you have a teaching degree, surely you aren’t qualified to teach all of the subjects necessary for a good education." Their question is rhetorical. Firstly, they know how much devotion they put into their own classes for their student’s sake. It is a lot of work. And they only teach one class! Which leads me to my second point, teachers are aware that they are not qualified to teach every subject a student would need for graduation. They confess that no teacher could do it all. Their question is meant to take the wind out of our sails before we‘ve gone too far. It’s a question of discouragement - one to sober us to the task ahead, which is mostly posed to the parents of elementary students and those rather new to home schooling. Perhaps they are kindly trying to spare us because they don’t think we’ve counted the cost. I call this second group The Affronted. Homeschoolers bother them because they think our decision to home school is one of judgment on them or lack of concern about our children‘s welfare. They don’t yet know that teaching my children at home is a matter of faith.

Some ask because they are considering home schooling and are trying to find answers about how it all works. Usually, I vary my reply depending on the audience. Presently, I address this response to a Christian audience. It is this third and last category of people who ask "What are you gonna do about teaching chemistry?" that I call The Innocent. They really want to know because they are curious as to whether they too can do it. They are interested in your formula for success. To lay the foundation of this response you must know that I have an intimate relationship with the Creator. He made the universe. He made me. When I was wicked and His enemy He died so that we could have a relationship. He has proven His faithfulness. For me, the decision to home school is a constant exercise of faith. I am teaching my children at home in order to glorify Him. It is not easy. I am not faultless. I am naturally lazy, impatient, and selfish. However, God calls me to be more like Him and promises to help me make the transition. By spending my life with my children, I have abundant opportunities to exercise patience, compassion, selflessness, gentleness, and we could go on indefinitely with the list of attributes that I am given the chance to cultivate. Whether I take them or miss them, the opportunities to grow in spirit that come from the decision to take my role as parent into the educational realm are endless.

When the Christian mom who has decided to home school has her oldest in kindergarten and is asking "What about chemistry?" What she wants to know is "Will God abandon our family when we reach high school?" So now I ask "What?!?!?" Why would He do that? Is it too hard for Him? He knows more about that subject and every other than anybody! Oh, I know, He’s so tired of me utterly relying on Him that He will simply refuse to provide a way. Perhaps I’ve used up my favors and now I’m going to have to go it alone. Do we see the absurdity of the question?

It is God’s desire that we become as dependant on His provision as little children. Since He’s promised to take care of our needs, our obligation is to seek Him first. It is our duty to walk by faith depending on Him. Abraham is an example of faithfulness that pleases God. He was obedient to God’s command to sacrifice his son. Yet Abraham believed God would fulfill His promise to build a great nation through Isaac. How could a dead son be the father of a great nation? Abraham speculated on how God would fulfill His promise; however, it was only when Isaac was tied down on top of the altar and the dagger drawn that God provided a way. Don’t draw your daggers yet. We aren’t asked to sacrifice our children. Just to trust them and ourselves in God’s hands. When we stay awake at night worrying about how to teach chemistry to our children when the oldest is yet seven are we really walking by faith? It’s not wrong to speculate on how God will provide. Abraham did, but his focus was not on fixing the problem. It was on obedience which God credited as faith. It’s not walking by faith if we fret because we can’t see every step of the entire path of our children’s 13-year education. We, like Abraham, need to have confidence in God’s provision.

Beloved, before we close let me propose one last thought. Above our children learning chemistry, it may be that the greatest lesson is for us to live by faith. When someone asks you the question next, do not give the glory to the plethora of aides that are available such as DVD’s, co-ops, satellite schools, special classes, and tutors. Give the glory to God and say, "I dunno yet how I’ll teach chemistry, but I am confident that God will provide for all of our needs."

What I Learned, or Re-Learned, This Week

2010-01-17T10:23:00.000-05:00

I have been knitting incorrectly for years, but it doesn't matter because the result is the same.

Some of our best school lessons can happen when my daughter climbs in bed with me in the morning and we just talk.

Sometimes I need to let go and let my child be herself and trust that she will act appropriately.

Chocolate fondue is amazing.

My husband is a much better driver than I give him credit for.

No matter how comfortable a hotel bed it, there is nothing like being at home in your own bed.

The best of plans can be completely sidelined by something as simple as rain.

Just because someone else likes a particular tourist attraction, doesn't mean you and your family will as well.

FDR died at his “Little White House” in Georgia.

The occasional nap is a wondrous thing.

I absolutely love taking pictures with my new camera.

My God loves me! (Yes, I already knew this, but I love it when He reminds me.)

Dirty Hidden Places

2010-01-15T12:05:00.000-05:00

Even after years of cleaning house, I'm amazed at how often I still find new little hidden places that need lots of cleaning attention. Today, as I mopped my kitchen floor, I noticed nasty little splats of dried milk at the bottom of the kitchen table's legs. "Eww, gross!" I thought to myself. "How long has that mess been there?"

It's funny because I stood there alone and a little embarrassed at my dirty little oversight, so I quickly started finding cleaning products to get the spots clean.

I find that my spiritual "kitchen" can be the exact same way. I try my best weekly to keep myself clean with routine processes like faithful church attendance, bible study, and prayer, but sometimes I find little hidden places in my Christianity that are dirty with old, dried stains.

Yesterday's stain was self-pity. Sometimes when I'm down, I justify my feelings by the actions of others. I can find a reason to be offended by any little thing. Being overlooked for an invitation to someone's party. Someone deciding, without notification, to not attend an event I invited them to. Any little reason will do. I often expect that others should act and react in the same ways that I do. I know this is completely wrong and un-Christian-like behavior, yet I allowed those sinful stains to dry up and make a mess of my Christian display.

A friend once told me, "Avoid self-pity. It is an aggressive enemy that will keep you from your destiny."

I know that I should heed Paul's advice to the Phillippians to always "think on good things." (Philippians 4:8) If I'd stop allowing myself to be so easily offended, I'd be a much happier individual and reap the benefits of counting everything joy.

My sister Lana always reminds me to ask God to create in me a clean heart (Psalms 51:10). And that's exactly my prayer for today.

A Little Help From My Friends

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The way I see it is that there are a LOT of women - good, Christian, out-there-trying-to-make-a-difference women who, at the end of the day, are wiped out and exhausted and feeling, for lack of a better word, alone. (Though the mothers among them will tell you: to be truly alone is a rarity.)

I feel like we often forget that through our amazing Father, we are SISTERS. When I think about the way I am able to talk to my own sister and the honest way my guard is completely down, I wonder why I am not that way with my Christian sisters. Why do I hold back or feel shy or self-conscious?

It is, with this in mind, that this blog has come to be. A few of my sisters and I want to delve into our lives and share and invite you to share with us, as well.

Ecclesiastes 1:9 says there is "nothing new under the sun". I feel that any challenge I may face, some other wife and mother has been there before me. Perhaps she can offer her support or advice or even just her ear and maybe I can do the same for someone else.

My hope is that we can take the modern technologies available to us and form stronger bonds with one another and also to our Lord. While achieving the near perfection of the woman in Proverbs 31 may be impossible, I think we may all get a little closer if we have one another to lean on along the way.

Our Inspiration

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Proverbs 31:10 - 31

10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.
11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good and not evil All the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax, And willingly works with her hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar.
15 She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength, And strengthens her arms.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is good, And her lamp does not go out by night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hand holds the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies sashes for the merchants.
25 Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her:
29 "Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all."
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.